Were it my character, I'd write her in such a way that it's clear that she's using lack of sex as an excuse for her behavior, not that the lack is causing the behavior. I get the impression that even if she were to get laid, she'd still go off the rails because she's frickin' nuts. And for what it's worth, I like the idea of her being noticed by some men, but each one of them is "beneath her" and "don't count." Perhaps her first kill could ultimately be a guy she's attracted to who doesn't reciprocate (a close friend or something?), and it spreads from there. Maybe she moves on to offing people who look like that first victim, or more people she's attracted to but don't give her the attention she wants. Notices a cute guy on the street, but he never looks at her. She stalks him for a while and ultimately kills him. I don't know, just throwing ideas out there.
Okay thanks everyone for your input. Even though she feels she is entitled sex that is just her feelings as the villain. The story itself is not justifying what she is doing. She is only justifying it, in her own head, but story is not trying to send a message saying that. I don't mean to be offend the reader. I want the reader to think of her as low, which they are suppose to since, she is the villain. However, how can I write such a character without offending people? Like there are plenty of fictional stories with serial killer villains in, so what do those writers do, or what can I do, to make the character more acceptable as a villain, who is a wrongdoer, but without the reader taking personal offense? Like for example, in a book like The Silence of the Lambs, or Red Dragon, how did they succeed in not making the character offensive to the reader? Well Silence of the Lambs got some flack from the transgender community when it came out I read, but the offense was not so overwhelming that it ruined the story for the majority. But maybe I shouldn't use past examples, and perhaps my character needs a different approach? As for how much of the story is written, I have written almost all of it now, and refined a lot. I am dealing with writing her background now, and wanted to explore it more, but I have her driving actions that drive the plot all finished now, pretty much, as well as the other characters.
The offense is in your repeated insistence that this character is the way she is "because" she didn't get sex when she wanted it. That "because", that statement of causality, is the deeply offensive part.
Okay thanks. What can I do to write it so that the reader does it not take offense to it, or take it on a personal level?
You can accept that a lack of sex does NOT cause a person to become a psychopathic serial killer. But you seem very, very dedicated to that idea. In many threads, you have refused to release it. So I really can't see how your story can work.
Oh okay. I just want it to be finished with the character background and all to release it. Well I can perhaps change her motive around maybe. I mean she in the story she goes around committing those types of crimes, and the plot hands on that, but her motive can perhaps be changed, without changing the whole story around, since it's just the motive. Are there any more acceptable motives for this type of criminal behavior to the reader?
Well what would the sensible motives be then? I couldn't really find a lot on google. The only motive I could find for female rapists, is to punish male rapists, and there have been a few cases of that I read. However, in my story, the villain rapes the hero, who then sets out to get revenge on her. But I do not want the hero to be a rapist himself, which is why she raped him. So I want a different motive for her, than that of course. I can keep looking, but are there any sensible ones, that I may have over looked?
I've offered the same possible reason, many many times in many many threads. Maybe you could search those threads, since it appears that saying it again isn't going to allow it to be heard.
I don't see what the fuss is. Your MC is a psycho. Psycho's can go off the wall for any apparent reason. She repulses everyone she approaches because she is a psycho (weird behavior and mannerisms) and quickly begins to resent men for rejecting her. This is pretty standard stuff. It's going to work fine.
As I understand it, the rejection is supposed to be the cause, not the effect. An otherwise normal person is driven to homicide because people don't consent to have sex with them. That's what I find both implausible and offensive.
She could have some character trait that she cannot control, which she sees every man as not suitable for her. Holding an impossible standard can drive one to madness, as well as feelings of rejection. Women are not typically known for being aggressive in the dating ritual, and that can be a turnoff for a vast majority of men. Perhaps this aggressive position of imposed entitlement and dominance, is what drives suitors away. She would have to take this to an extreme, as women are taught to be refined, elegant, subtle, and nonthreatening. This would all stem from some horror/freak show backstory involving her terrible relationship being raised by an unfit mother or father. This derives the delusion after she hits her snapping point, which she has a mental meltdown. Then in good/bad intentions will only fuel her justification for killing the men in serial fashion. Something hints towards sexual assault on the victims, or possibly a vicious attack with a knife on the victims genitals (or both). Possibly even removing the genitals pre or post mortem, depending on just how sadistic your female unsub is. Inclusion of abduction and holding the victim for a length of time to play out some sort of odd fantasy she has, as well as physical/emotional torture of the victim. There should be a level of evolution to the killer, as she would not start out perfect with her first few victims. Trophy taking is a variable that you will have to figure out, but what and why are entirely up to your discretion. Your killer ultimately sees herself in a negative way, which she imposes on her male victims. I am ugly, therefore they think that I am ugly. Even though the entire thing is pure fiction as women have far less trouble in real life, it is an interesting dive into the much more viscous mind of women as men are not as cruel. Flipping the standard paradigm on its head is kinda neat. Sorry to make this so long, but between watching all 11 seasons of Criminal Minds and reading Mind Hunters (True Crime novel from a guy retired from the FBI that started a division to catch serial killers) I like the psychology behind all this really dark stuff. The most interesting serial killers are the ones in a few episodes of Criminal Minds that don't intentionally kill their victims, but that does not mean they are any less scary.
Okay thanks. I will keep thinking on it. I know there were some motives suggested before, but I felt those motives just didn't work for this story. I can keep looking and see if I can find one that works. Cause I got the story well thought out now, just not the motive, which I kept putting off, cause I was so busy trying to get the plot down more so. But maybe she doesn't have to kill her victims but can rape them only. However, is that too risky? Her victims can then go to the police if she lets them go, but could she keep getting away with it as long as she weared a mask, gloves, and cleaned up the crime scenes forensically?
As I recall, you objected to every single cause that wasn't someone being driven insane by not getting sex on demand. You seem very set on that concept. But that concept makes no sense, none at all. Being deprived of sex doesn't drive one to rape, either. That doesn't make it any better.
Alright then well I am open now to new motives. Just need to find one that would work for this story more.
What would make it "work" for the story? You keep referring to Silence of the Lambs, but utterly rejecting the cause--severe childhood abuse--that was involved there. Why doesn't that one work?
Well basically in my story, the woman will try to seduce men, then fail, then go after them in more evil ways. So I feel that her motivation should be related to her targets. For the story to go the way I have it, I want her to feel it's her targets' fault, and not the fault of a childhood upbringing that has nothing to do with her targets. Since one of her victims is also the MC in story, I feel that her motive has to have something to do with something inside the MC, that she targets. The MC has nothing to do with child abuse, or is an abuser himself. So whatever her reason for targeting men, it has to be something about the MC that she is targeting, that she does not like. I looked up different types of rapists, and there is one wikipedia that sounds like mine. Here is the quote from wikipedia:
Maybe she doesn't just want sex, ok yeah, she's plain, but like you say it's rare for a woman who just wants sex to not get it because men are dumb and they will just have sex for the sake of it. So for this character to be real could she make her victims play some kind of game, some kind of ritual. Could it be that she's had lots of meaningless sex, maybe even allowed herself to be abused in order to get attention and now something has snapped so she makes her victims play a part that she knows is unsustainable and therefore they have to die.
That - having lots of meaningless sex can be pretty hard on the psyche (especially if she feels its the only way she can get validation) , thus what drives hr to the point of psychotic break is not 'not being able to get sexual partners' but that none of her sexual partners value her as anything other than an outlet for their sexual drives. of course you then have to deal with why she is like this, and making it because she is ugly is cheap, too easy, and likely to offend potential readers. She could actually be good looking but completely messed up inside - perhaps her first sexual encounter was being abused a teenager by a figure of authority, which is why she now has limited self worth, and when she finally breaks why she goes after figures of authority such as the MC who is a cop. What really doesn't work for me though is that you've got this character also being a vicious gang leader and conducting "blood ins" on gang recruits - which doesn't work at all with the rape storyline - it feels to me like you should park the whole gang/blood in thing for book 2
Yeah I could have another motive for her rather than her not getting sex only. Like maybe men do not value her as relationship material or marriage material, and that gets under her skin instead. So she uses rape as her way of getting revenge on men, even though it's not just sex she wants, but figures it's her best weapon to make a point maybe? As for rest of the gang, they are going around committing rapes, just like she is, so they are all committing the same crimes for the same over all purpose. I just have to come up with a motive that readers will appreciate more for their actions. And the reason why she has a gang is because it creates a bigger adversary for the police and the crimes are bigger, cause they being committed by more people, than just one, having to do everything her self. For the type of plot I have, I need at least four gang members, since the plot I have requires them to be in different places, doing different things, to bring everything together. I want the gang to be taken down by the end of book 1 though, since I planned on that being the ending. I think that it's all do-able for one book, at least I hope. The blood in, is the inciting event that gets the police investigating going though, and all the clues the police and the MC find out, come out of the blood in, so the blood in gone wrong, is the biggest part of the plot, that drives the rest.
