So, this happens to me more often than I feel like it should. I get really into an idea and it's great, sometimes for many chapters, but a few times it happens super 'early' in the idea. I get far enough to know if I like an idea, but then I'll reach a point where everything just 'stops' like literally. Scene ideas, plot threads etc. It's like I love the idea but the closer I get to the end I don't want it to. And as I've said, this tends to happen either really early or really late. It's never like, in a 'comfortable' stopping point where I could put it down and come back with a fresh mind. Sometimes I don't even the first chapter. I think cold feet is the perfect way to describe this feeling. It feels like stage fright though not quite as intense. I have a rare instance where I have most of the plot figured out, and I could continue to write it. But it feels weird to just force it. Even knowing I can go back and re-write it later after I finish the draft.
One writes, I think. What you're describing sounds like a form of procrastination I've seen described as 'finishing fear', the idea that, if you finish the book and publish it, you'll be saying, "This is the best I can do" and you'll always think that the work could be better. I doubt if there's any way to overcome it other than just writing (and publishing) through it.
Early on a project is wide open—there are many different ways it could go. But as you progress through it the possibilities narrow until there's only a few left, and finally only one. The early part is the fun part. You have to wrap up all the loose threads you put in earlier, pay off all the setups. That's work rather than fun. Plus closing those creative doors one by one feels very limiting. You move from creativity to the grind of writing.
Go ahead and slap an ending on it. Just finish it regardless of whether the ending is, in your opinion, poorly executed or brings deus ex machina to new heights (lows?). In the end, everything you do related to writing is building a habit and routine. Thus, you either build the habit of finishing or you build the habit of not finishing. Once finishing becomes a habit, your subconscious will begin working over those rough finishes and supply ways to smooth them out. ~S
I don't know what your process is for writing, but as I read this I wondered if you use an outline. My thinking is if you create an outline while the story is 'fresh' in your mind, as you progress through the writing phase, you have something to work towards, instead of having that 'open-ended' feel. In my case I seldom use an outline and end up revising ad infiniteum, which is not all that dissimilar to your 'cold feet'. It just doesn't get "finished". A short story I recently posted on this forum was 'finished' with an outline. Not sure if I find it liberating or not, too early to tell. I may try outlining again in the future. JMHO...
I actually know exactly what you're talking about. I get that stage fright feeling a lot when it comes to writing. It doesn't affect my ability to finish stories. I think it's worse for me earlier in a story rather than later. And I think it can lead to or fall in with a form of procrastination, but I'm still a pretty prolific writer. Creating a writing routine/schedule is something that can really help, but that feeling is still there sometimes. Sticking to a routine does force you to get the job done and tame these feelings.
Get used to weird, then, because sometimes powering through a composition is often exactly what needs to be done. Those sessions when writing is effortless bliss are wonderful in part because they are rare. The rest of the time, one simply plows through the job to the end, despite discomfort, irritation, and a severe case of the "I donwannas." In most of my writing, I have deadlines to meet, and I have a dread of missing a deadline that trumps anything else. With a big fiction project, I don't get what you describe as stage fright as much as I get separation anxiety: what on earth am I going to do when I have to say good-bye to these characters and this story? Where am I ever going to come up with another concept this appealing? Is this the denouement of my career as a novelist? Blah, blah, blah, blah. At this point, I have to sit me down and firmly tell me to cowboy the hell up and finish the job, because ultimately, that's what writing is: a job. A creative job and one that I love, but still a job. When I get into separation anxiety/stage fright/procrastination mode, I set myself a deadline and then I set about meeting it. Saying which, I need t take my own advice and go set a deadline for finishing the summary I'm writing. I suck at writing summaries, it is a task that bores and frustrates me half out of my mind, but... Procrastination is my besetting sin and if I let myself give into it, I'll never get another thing done in this lifetime. Sigh. Cowgirl the hell up, Catriona.
Yeah, I do get attached to these characters (probably too much for my own good, honestly) and the thought of 'letting them go' is something I dread, which of course leads to procrastination. I'm actually not super far from the proper 'ending' of this particular story (maybe three or four chapters away) but I still get separation anxiety. I know I could always write a sequel if I want to use these characters again, that doesn't make it any easier to let em go. (Particularly Meiji, she's a snarky gem of a character and she's fun to write, the other characters are fun too)
