I just can't stand it anymore. I'll do the dishes, clean off the stove, the counter tops, and the kitchen table, then within hours my psychologically challenged slob room mate will have spilled things all over the things I JUST cleaned and not cleaned up after himself. I've pointed it out to him, even two days ago when I found he spilled cherry Koolaid down the entire front door of the white refrigerator and he just left it to dry. He just blames it on not knowing what he is doing because he has 'insomnia.' He never takes responsibility for his own actions, and is a total mooch. So what can I do to get him to clean up after himself? He refuses to admit he is a schizophrenic despite he has been getting SSI since 1985 for it. I can not and will not be his maid. Ideas?
Even though I can't really afford it, that is about what it is going to come down to. Even if someone comes just one day a week.
No, it's a long story and I only have this one as a favor for my landlord. Problem is, if I kick him out then I piss my landlord off unless I can show my landlord how big of a slob he is.
I'm with this right here. Dyed in the wool slobs have made a decision at some point that dealing with you getting in their grill is a cost they are willing to pay in order for you to always be the one to clean. EDIT ~ Just saw your reply to T.Trian. Ask your landlord to take up some of the cost of a housekeeper by lowing your rent some.
That's actually not a bad idea. If I tell the landlord that what I have to put up with is so bad, and show him pictures of the bathrrom I have to share with the room mate, he would have to agree. I only use the bathroom to take a shower not use the toilet, and thank goodness because the toilet and the floor around it makes me want to throw up.
I have to agree with this... It´s something that's just really difficult to change. I was racking my brain for some solution 'cause I'm familiar with the type, but even trying to out-slob them won't work and will just cause a bunch of other problems. I guess if you managed to scare him with real and made up stories of what happens if you leave stuff lying around (like.... it attracts raccoons), show him pictures of little bugs his messiness invites into your household, etc. ETA: reading your previous post... never mind. Looks like he wouldn't care anyway.
Hey I appreciate the ideas. Sometimes you just have some many problems of your own, that becomes almost impossible to deal with the problems of others compounding your life.
Why are there two words for raccoon in Finnish? Supi and pesukarhu. Is there a difference? Is one like aawww, raccoon! and the other like run! raccoon!...?
Oh you want a good one? In Norway the same word for marriage, also means death (or something like that). I saw it on television.
Can you move out once the lease expires? That's what I would do. The way you describe it, living with your roommate sounds like a nightmare.
What about setting aside one to three evenings a week where you both clean together? It could be a social thing (you could order a pizza if he can participate in all three evenings). Would he be open to trying that? Maybe if he had a "manager" overseeing his attempts to clean he might improve, especially if there is positive reinforcement. Many people are motivated by praise. That's interesting about the insomnia. There are many nights where I wake up several times and I end up cleaning everything...lol, as if this wasn't enough of a problem during the evenings and weekends. I must hold a record at picking up dust clumps by hand.
I would approach this on the assumption that he absolutely will not clean or contribute. Ever. No matter what. And that therefore the solution has to take some other form. Some random thoughts, though they certainly don't form a complete solution: - The best position to take with the landlord is probably a more-in-sorrow-than-in-anger expression of your worries about the property damage that your roommate may be causing despite all of your best efforts to protect the property. - Can you lock any of the kitchen cabinets so he can't get at your food or dishes? How about stocking the other cabinets with paper plates and cups so that he can't produce any dishes for you to wash, but he's not motivated to go out and buy dishes that he will then leave dirty? It's not fair that you'd then have to bag the paper plates and take them to the trash, but it's less work than washing dishes. Of course, if he owns any dishes of his own this is harder. - How much fridge space do you need? Can you put a second fridge in your room? You could clean the kitchen fridge to sparkling perfection, take a picture, and let your landlord know that you're giving that fridge entirely to your roommate. - It might be good to clean that disgusting bathroom exactly once, so that you can take a shiny picture and tell the landlord the same thing. Only, though, if the landlord might think that you're lying about who made the mess in the picture. - If there are shared spaces that you can divide and lock, I'd recommend doing so. For example, if there's a coat closet and a linen closet and he trashes them both, take one and lock it and give him the other.
If you have this roommate as a favor to the landlord, I think the best solution is to present the problem to the landlord and tell him you just can't take it anymore. As a rule, landlords are not huge fans of people living like complete slobs in their properties.
Haha. No, it seems the same animal -- your raccoon -- was first called pesukarhu , but it should be called supi. But then we have another mammal over here called supikoira (raccoon dog) which is often called supi for short. It must be some kind of raccoon conspiracy to confuse people, so while we're mulling over what to call them, they come and empty our refridgerators.
Yes, exactly. As I was reading through this thread, this is exactly what I was thinking. If this is a favour to your landlord, you need to get firm with your landlord. Presumably your landlord wants to keep YOU? If this slobbo is a friend or relative of the landlord, the landlord should be able to put his foot down. Either the guy does his share of the cleaning AND stops being such a slob. Or HE's out. Actually, if I were you (and I don't know your circumstances) I would start looking for another place to live. The feeling that you can't piss off your landlord by raising this issue makes me think your landlord's not worth keeping either. This is stressing you out. Time to abandon ship.
I feel your pain! I used to share a house with about 8 people a while back, and two Swedish guys moved in to the house - 2 complete STONERS, might I add - and I'd never lived with two more slovenly people in all my life. Now I'm no saint. I am by no means the tidiest person to live with, but these two creatures took the biscuit. I'd come home from work with the intention of making myself some dinner, and they would leave pans with half an inch grease still sitting on the cooker (some sausages lying in it); they would stack dishes up to the ceiling, not rinsed but hardened with loads of stuff lying on them for weeks; they stole your food, never bought any milk, sugar, cleaning products. They left tobacco and skins lying all over the kitchen table, empty crisp packets, you name it. Half the tenants in the house moved out within two months of these guys moving in. The landlord didn't give a toss to anyone's complaints.
Well it is not a simple problem. Your mate is not a logical person and don't believe in anything. How can you hold down in his brain that he has to be regular and arranged? Training him is hard for you. The best remedy is that you encourage him repeatedly to do his homework, just like a kid. You must arouse his internal and mental powers and motivations. For example sometimes smile him and tell him the lovely things. " you are a handsome man " ( even though he is ugly ) - your eyes are beautiful - you are my hero - how much strong arms!! Can you lift this refrigerator ( but please be careful don't hurt himself by lifting it)- Oh how much you are clean today ( Although he is dirty) - You are the best hubby in the city ...and so on I promise you, it will work...Just you need a period of the time. He will get better gradually
These are alternative and is told him interval. Of course what I offered Lewdog was some example. I think she herself knows how can do encourages him, what words could be used and at what time.
He might think he is in love with him, he in turn might be homophobic and then he might move out of the house. Problem solved. You know, I think Mans is on to something
I lived in a house with four other guys and four hunting dogs. Only two of us cleaned and we decided to go on strike. Unfortunately, our strike coincided with the return of the McRib, a favorite of our three slovenly housemates. The dishes piled up and and little red and white cardboard containers spilled out of the trash onto the floor. On day six of our strike, I was watching the dogs through the window above the kitchen sink when I noticed the plates started moving. They were writhing with maggots. My friend and I waited for the others to come home and show them how bad the kitchen had become. They put down their McDonald's bags and threw all of the plates into the garbage can and wheeled it out to the garage.
