Ah, you have a terrible affliction. It's called artistry, and there is no cure. Your only hope now is to keep practicing what you're doing until other people tell you that your work has gotten better. It won't ever seem better to you, but you have to just trust what they are telling you. And if you need someone to talk to, there's no mental illness thread or sub-forum, but I'm BpD II and there are a couple of us around on here. Feel free to PM at any time.
Is there something there or not? That's what you need to figure out. Is there some sort of potential in the story itself that makes it so you say to yourself... "I can't give up on this." That's what you need to look for. It could be a character, a particular scene, a plot device, a theme, etc. but just something that makes it so you can't let go of it and KNOW you have to finish it. I'm always in and out of doubt with my current drama, that comes with the writing process, but I know deep down that there is a key element that makes my story stand out, and that's the way it's told, and I'm still evolving the plot and characters as I actually have been doing that for years now. I'm a little stuck on the overall structure of the story, but my ending specifically is the main reason why I'll never give up on it until there is a draft in my hands. I have to get to that ending no matter what, whatever it takes.
Thank you all so much for your encouragement and advice. My planning process... it basically goes like this: I get an idea for a character or a scene or an event or whatever, I obsess over it in my mind for a while, I start to put it down on paper via shorthand notes, I try to figure out what the point of the story is, I vaguely arrange a sequence of events which consists mostly of a specific beginning middle and end and I just jot down "And stuff happens in between" thinking I'll get it once I start writing but it never works out well. And then I start writing. I have never finished a project. Okay, I lied - when I was like 10 I wrote a Nancy Drew ripoff that was twelve pages long, and I wrote a short story in elementary school about a tiny man named Paul who saves the world, and in high school I finished a short story for my creative writing class. But I have never really truly had a polished piece of writing other than some of my poetry maybe. I just hate myself so much. I'm proud of myself though... I believe in my idea so I continued to write this story and I'm actually progressing with it. I'm excited. To be honest, I don't even care if it's awful. I think it will be a huge wake up call and a huge thrill to have finished a story for the first time since I was 17. I really need to make myself come to this forum because it's really good for me and you guys are all so good for me.
Just remember this. Perfection never appears the first time you try something. You will be crap at anything you do, until you've practised a lot, and learned how to do it better. If you walk away from everything that doesn't go right first time (or second, or third), you'll probably accomplish nothing in your life, will you? So don't make writing any different. Of course your first writing efforts will be crap. So see what you can do to make them better. The most important tip I can give you is to read. Read books for pleasure to get a feel for what a 'good' book is like. (If you want to play football, you first watch football games played by people who already know what they're doing, right?) Then read books ABOUT writing, which will give you tips on all the things you're struggling to do. One particular word of warning. While this forum has lots of people who can give you encouragement and share your triumphs and blue funks, don't rely on us to build your story for you. Part of learning to write is learning to solve your story problems yourself. If your characters get 'stuck,' then it's up to you to unstick them. If you think your character is boring, then you must find a way to make him/her more interesting. Play what-if games with yourself. What if an earthquake happened in my setting, instead of a fire? What if my character was older, younger? More athletic? Breaks his leg? Don't come onto the forum and say "My character is boring, what do I do to make him more interesting?" Trying to brainstorm solutions instead of working them out for yourself is a very bad habit, and will hold you back as a writer. So is seeking approval for every idea that pops into your head. If the idea intrigues you, that's all you need. Just get to work on it and get it written. Don't encourage other people to hold your hand during this process. Once your story is finished, THEN is when you should seek feedback from other people. You want to find out if your story works, and there's only one way to do that. Put it out there and see what comes back. But write it yourself, first. Good luck. Have fun. And if you don't do it already ...start reading! Forget TV and movies as inspiration. Read. That's the medium you're choosing to work in, so you need to get a feel for how written stories work.
lolol It's basically my brain vomiting into microsoft word. I didn’t know Wren Black, but I know everything about her death. I know that one night sixty-eight days ago, she decided to walk down a long stretch of quiet highway in our small town despite the storm heading our away. I know that it was a Wednesday, and it was sixty-six degrees that night, and the moon was a bright white disc in the smoky night, and the air was damp enough to fog your glasses up if you were unfortunate enough to wear them (which she didn’t). I know that on that night, Wren had her hair pulled back in a ponytail and wore a pair of faded yoga pants and a turquoise wife-beater and black sneakers and a black backpack. I know that she looked casual and effortless and beautiful, because that was how she always was in high school, swaying down the halls with grace and confidence people like me could only fantasize about. I know that at some point, a car pulled up beside her on the gravelly shoulder and whoever was driving began to talk to her. That’s all I know. I need to know more. I stare at the sky. The skin on my back burns against the snow on the frozen ground. Flurries fall from the blackness and melt on my warm, red-wine-flushed skin. My mouth tastes like death and I don’t feel empty-headed enough so I need another drink. I know if I try to stand up, I will puke all over the snow, but I wobble up anyway. I retch over a snowy mound of soil, the scalding fermented vomit running in a steaming river through the yard. I hope nobody is awake at this hour and watching me through a window, naked and drunk and puking in the snow in the middle of the night. Wiping my mouth with my arm, I stumble up the icy steps to the front door and somehow manage to get inside without cracking my skull on the sidewalk. The air feels like a hot musty blanket laying over my face after the crisp, clean air of the cold night.
I have never really been very ...outward with my writing. I have been private and kept it to myself and kind of lived in my head. This is me trying to reach out because I feel like maybe I need to connect with other writers. I am scared to share my writing with people and I'm scared to share my ideas. I am terrified of being told that I can never be a writer since it's the only thing I do. Which funnily enough makes it harder for me to pursue it.
I do this constantly. It's annoying. I "nurture" all of these ideas until they no longer seem like good ideas, and they just seem like my ramblings that I wasted a whole lot of time on for no reason. Then I write it anyway, and someone tells me it's pretty alright, and I don't really know what they see in it, but the cycle continues because it must. I think @Jack Asher hit the nail on the head. It's just that writing is kind of a weird art, in the sense that it's also very technical and staunch at certain times, and in certain forms. Because of that, I think that we don't always see it as an "art," nor do we always see authors as "artists." We just have to give ourselves a little more slack, and remember that this is pretty normal for the process of a creative. Print this out and put it where you write to remind yourself that you'll get through it, and land on #6, even if it takes forever and changes a little in the process -- the thing about writing for fun is that there aren't any deadlines, so you don't have to beat yourself up so much about how long you spend on a project and how many words you write daily.
Oh, I think you're on the right track entirely. Don't feel you need to show your unfinished work around. I NEVER do that. I think all of us who 'write' have felt we can't do it, at some stage. But stop worrying about what might happen, or might not happen, and just get stuck in. And have fun. Get enthusiastic about your story, rather than worrying about making mistakes. Enthusiasm will come through in your writing. So will timidity, so don't allow that to take over your brain! Don't forget ...ANY and all mistakes can be fixed. So don't worry about making them. Accept that you will make them.
I love that! I remember my particular nadir moment. I was in the middle of Borders bookstore in Glasgow (while it was still on the go) and standing in the middle of the second floor fiction section. I looked around and thought ...shit. Just what the world needs. Another damn book!
That is how I feel often. I go to Goodwill and see all the random old paperbacks that nobody cares about and I get really sad because I realize how many writers exist vs. how many writers actually "make it."
I think that's more of a charity donation than a ‘Pile of shit no one cares about.’ At one point, that stuff was important to someone (general ‘someone’), but they outgrew it and donated it to Goodwill so someone else can enjoy it. I mean, you'd probably find some Stephen King books in there, and he was one of the authors who 'made it'.
I wouldn't worry about your projects, everyone introspective can be pretty self-conscious and self deprecating. That you care enough to make a post about it, and you still want to be a writer despite it, is I think the sign someone deserves to be called a writer unironically. Please don't put your work down - especially if you easily put yourself down too. And I also wouldn't worry at all about canoninity - making some great impact in human culture, you can't control that sort of thing. All worrying about that will do is make your own self-doubt even worse than it already is. Far too many writers focus on making something 'good literature' rather than actually making something good. And too many authors are only recognized after their death. And too many hacks get popular for no real reason. You don't have any control over what will happen to a work after you've finished it - it's kind of like raising a kid in a way. You've got to feed it and nurture it and prepare it for the world, but if the kid makes it is down to luck and the hardwork of itself and it's friends (publishers, critics, advertisers, readers on Goodreads and sites like this, blah blah blah). Just keep focused on the one thing, because the other way lies madness or your own work suffering.
I agree. To continue with the child-rearing analogy, it's like taking a newborn and expecting him/her to grow up to be the next Neil deGrasse Tyson. You've no idea what the child will grow up to be, all you can do is do the best you can. If all they can (or want) to do is work at some small local library, then, that's just fine. A book is kind of like that. If you expect the book to be the next Greatest [Insert Nation] Novel, one that would re-define human culture as we know it, then you're setting yourself up for disappointment before you even pen down the first word. I'll be honest, the stuff I'm writing will likely be stuffed away with all the other countless stories, just one more thing in a long list of other things. I'm actually kind of OK with that. Granted, that doesn't mean I can just write absolute shit and publish it, no. All the stuff about making sure everything's nice and tight, interesting, etc. goes without saying. The whole idea, OP, is to just write the story and don't worry about it. Trust me, I wasted ten years stewing with worry over my fantasy, sci-fi, and historical mystery because I kept putting too much pressure on myself. I was expecting myself to be the next George R.R. Martin, the next Agatha Christie. The next Matthew Stover. Only now have I finally gotten rid of the anxiety and actually started writing them. Without caring one bit how they'll end up in the future. Just write your projects. Complete them. Good luck!
About a month ago, I dropped out of my routine to write everyday, in fact I stopped altogether, as I had a seriously busy schedule and was exhausted. Now things have settled down, I want to start writing again, but I'm finding it harder to find the time. Does anybody have any tips for kick starting themselves?
If you want to bad enough you will. If you don't, you won't. It's not something you can or should force.
It's a strange thing, I really want to write, I do have an hour a day to write, but I seem to never get around to it... Urgh!
You can't go at it half baked; writing for the sake of writing is very difficult. What really helped me were the short story contests on this site- they're low pressure, time restrictive, and you have a quick turn around on results. Take a short story prompt, think about what you'd like to write throughout the day, and then you're primed when the time comes. Once you have that step down it's your turn to figure out the processes for continuing and finishing a story; I could really use some cliff-notes.
If you REALLY want to write, you will. If you keep finding other things to do instead, you need to ask yourself "why?" If it's fear that you won't be able to pick up where you left off, or that you'll forget what you were planning on writing, there's only one way to deal with that...sit yourself down and deal with it. Best of luck.
Find something you want to write - come up with a general narrative - and write it! For example, I had been stuck on a short story for months and was overthinking everything from the story itself to how I'd approach finishing it. This led to me postponing actually working on it. One day, fed up, I just told myself to write - write anything that comes to mind, let the story flow and from that came 3500 words and a completed story in one sitting. Now I'm invigorated with the sense of purpose and ability. Try it out.
I think it's because I feel an hour is not enough time to begin where I left off... I want to write my current wip but I do have another story idea I want to develop. I find myself doing work... Checking emails, etc etc
Find more time, which means you have to sacrifice something. I've sacrificed my video gaming for writing. But that doesn't mean that I've completely eschewed video gaming. Like most professionals, you need a bit of R&R. When I've completed my allotted two-hour writing session, I give myself a treat by playing a video game, reading a book or just browsing the internet.
