Everything I can think of sounds terrible corny, I want to round off the end of this portion of a song I'm writing: I confess to you I pray that I'm enough and you confess that you do the same more than anything I want to be you everything -After that I've got nothing, it doesn't really have to rhyme but I'd like it to, any suggestions?
a tad too wordy for a song lyric... doesn't 'flow' well enough to suggest music, imo... and doesn't make much sense, either... i can't tell what it is you're trying to say... i'm a lyricist, among other things, so if you want some help with this, you can email me any time at all... love and hugs, maia maia3maia@hotmail.com
When you say you want something to rhyme it's a bit difficult for us because we don't know where the beats and pauses are in the music. you could simplify and break these lines in a variety of ways, which would give you different words to hang the rhyme on: e.g. I confess I want to be enough I pray That I'm enough And you, you say You'd do this to be enough Be together each day That will be enough... Hope this helps...
sprinkling it with rhyming words isn't enough to make it a good lyric, sorry to say... meter and line structure is equally important... and though you say it doesn't have to rhyme, mandy, it really does, to work well as a song...
Yeahh it is a bit wordy and confusing. If you try and rearrange your words and ideas so they make more sense and flow better, the next line will probably come to you
Well, the music that came into my head (kind of like Westlife, an Irish group) went well with this meter and structure, and I was not sprinkling random words to make it rhyme, as a matter of fact. I also think that some styles of song need a lot of repetition, but this can look boring when you see the lyrics written out. My sister is a retired opera singer and now a music teacher, so I do know just a little about song lyrics and music. I've often helped her adapt music for school performances, musicals and so on. But this just proves my point, that as we do not know the beats in the music, and style of song you have in mind, it is hard for us to give feedback on this.
