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  1. hawky94

    hawky94 Active Member

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    Ideas needed.

    Discussion in 'Plot Development' started by hawky94, Jan 25, 2011.

    I'm writing a military fiction novel... it's set in Afghanistan in the first few chapters... what's happened is the main character has been tasked with flying a group of Navy SEALs into the mountains and then to pick them up again, now once they get on the aircraft during ex-filtration they start to take incoming fire from an anti-aircraft position and are shot down... three die in the crash. The main character is now in command of the team... (the commander was killed when the chopper crashed)

    They come across a black site, which is a secret detention facility used by the CIA... they are captured and detained... what might happen next?... the MC hears the CIA talking about something... I'm just not sure what to make the something they are talking about?

    Assassination plot?
    Coup-d-etat?

    Any ideas?... it's completely open... feel free to send me anything.

    Thanks, Hawky94
     
  2. Ellipse

    Ellipse Contributor Contributor

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    Just one thing I felt I should point out. You should probably have your MC be part of the SEAL team rather than the pilot. The SEAL team would be specially trained to know the area and how to sneak about. The pilot wouldn't be carrying the same weapons, equipment, or have the needed knowledge the SEAL team would. The pilot taking charge of the SEAL team is highly unlikely.
     
  3. hawky94

    hawky94 Active Member

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    Good idea.

    Good idea mate... I hadn't thought of that. Since I'm a junior writer I'm a bit behind all of you... thanks mate...:)
     
  4. Pen

    Pen New Member

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    What's the overall tone/theme of the novel? If more political, go down the coup d'etat/secessionist movement line, with the bad guys highly motivated and thinking themselves to be the good guys- say this SEAL team is from the state or group of states that intends to secede, or the SEALS are going to be a part of the coup, say the Navy steaming into New York or whatever.

    Low-ranking officers might not be privy to classified info like that, so how he'd overhear sufficient information to convince him there's a real threat of a coup or secession I don't know.

    You could alternatively go down the "Heart of Darkness" route, with the local CIA commanders setting up their own personal fiefdoms enforced by corrupt soldiers- you would probably have to steer clear of "Apocalypse Now", but that, along with Heart of Darkness would be the ur-examples. Drug money could provide a motivation for the corruption, and the novel could have your SEAL team entering the service of one "lord", amid questions of loyalty "to people, or to the flag they carry?", and living reasonably well only to see their fiefdom under attack from another similar outfit or indeed the avenging force of the US military.
     
  5. hawky94

    hawky94 Active Member

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    Good ideas.

    Good ideas, thank you, but I've just noticed that I failed to mention that my MC is an RAF pilot. So, let's go down the coup-d-etat road. Say it is a coup, but I don't want it to be an internal US coup, or what about maybe the CIA has operatives inside of some foreign gov't. Russian, Chinese, British, gathering secret intelligence, and are putting together a black ops team to steal nuclear weapons - outlawed in a new fictional treaty signed by the US.

    What do you think?
     
  6. FrankABlissett

    FrankABlissett Active Member

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    Why does the CIA detain them? Missing soldiers create a scene, while those sworn to secrecy by a superior and sent back to their base do not. You'll have to find a compelling reason that the local commander would want to risk having the military poking around his turf, looking for the MIA soldiers.

    I do like the "Heart Of Darkness" idea Pen brought up though. Could give you something to work with.

    -Frank
     
  7. FrankABlissett

    FrankABlissett Active Member

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    Sorry. Stepped away from the computer a little while and posted after you did without knowing, Hawky.

    I would say that a rouge CIA cell with a nuclear weapon would cause a big red flashing light, klaxon horn alert in Washington - with or without a treaty.

    My guess is that the initial response would be to play nice with the soldiers, swear them to secrecy, and plan to let them get on with their lives. If they found out about their nukes, though, all bets may be off. A smart commander would let them go (with as much delay as possible) and destroy the evidence, but an unhinged sort may chose to eliminate them.

    -Frank
     
  8. Mallory

    Mallory Contributor Contributor

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    Imprisonment, torture and having to break out? :)
     
  9. hawky94

    hawky94 Active Member

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    I love it.
     
  10. hawky94

    hawky94 Active Member

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    Well... imprisonment and torture...

    Interesting. The CIA have done plenty of that... but as (your name escapes me) said, a smart commander would swear the remaining SEALs to secrecy.. but what about the MC?, he's British national, not bound by American military protocols?... I don't think I'd be willing to co-operate, but then again, what about him being tortured before he swears secrecy...

    Once he swears secrecy, he is released, then decides to tell his CO, whom is one day assassinated, suspecting the CIA's involvement it becomes a war between one man and a rogue CIA cell... one wants the truth to be told, the other, wants a nuclear deterrent against potential enemies.
     
  11. Mallory

    Mallory Contributor Contributor

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    Hi,
    I'd like to help more, but I'm not a military/war expert so you need to simplify some of this stuff for me. I'm not sure what U.S. Seal protocols are. :) What is he being sworn to secrecy on?
     
  12. Ellipse

    Ellipse Contributor Contributor

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    Don't forget the SEALS had their original mission. If they just suddenly disappear, someone will take notice, especially if it was a join operation between the US and Great Britain.
     
  13. hawky94

    hawky94 Active Member

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    Answer to Mallory's Questions and Ellipses.

    Well, Mallory, each nation has it's own version of the Official Secrets Act. If you swear by it, then any delicate information you are told is to remain secret, the US has a similar thing, being a Briton myself I haven't got a good grasp on it, but it is similar to the British Official Secrets Act, breaking the terms within the act could lead to a court-martial and discharge from the military.

    That's what I mean when I say US protocols, the CIA must be aware that the man is a British national by his accent and insignia, the American SEAL team could chose to be sworn to secrecy, because, as I mentioned earlier, this is a "black site" it officially does not exist, if its location were revealed it could be detrimental to US secrets, that's why the SEALs would be sworn to secrecy.

    The MC however is not an American, he's a British national, so I'm going to make it more difficult for the CIA to get him to swear to secrecy, perhaps torture... I don't know yet. Hope this answers your question.

    Ellipse, you are correct in thinking that, someone will take notice, but when the chopper is shot down the pilot doesn't have time to send a message to command, the power is cut by an American agent posing as a soldier at the moment the chopper is shot down, thereby preventing any rescue/digital images of location.

    Hope this helps the both of you. Thank you for your continued input and ideas, much appreciated. :)
     
  14. Ellipse

    Ellipse Contributor Contributor

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    You only breaking the law if you get caught. :cool:

    From this, it sounds like the only way to get him to not tell his superiors about the site would be to get him to defect to the US, or turn him into a double-agent. Most countries don't take kindly to having their agents tortured.

    Just keep in mind the US isn't the only country capable of satelite survelance. Nor are old methods of gaining intel discarded just because you have cool advanced technology. :D
     
  15. Birmingham

    Birmingham Active Member

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    I know I'm not answering the question you asked, but one of the things I would do, is give depth to the CIA agents, whether they're rogue or not. Like in The Rock, with Sean Connery, Nicholas Cage, and Ed Harris. The rogue soldiers felt they're doing absolutely the patriotic things (some of them did, anyway) and their commanding officer reminded them that even though they'll be considered traitors to America, the founding fathers were considered traitors to the Brits.

    In Timecop, they almost had depth as well, almost, when the villain, who went back in time to become rich, said something about how it would be better to have a president rich beyond his dreams, because then he won't be affected by special interest groups such as corporations, etc.

    Basically, even the darkest villain can convince himself that he's doing something beautiful, and you can write him in such a way that he truly commits himself to values that even the readers support. For example, rogue CIA agents who believe the agency didn't do enough for freedom and democracy worldwide, and so it's their job to free people.

    Oh, that reminds me! The bad guys in "Murder at 1600". I won't tell you too much about that if you haven't seen it, but the bad guys there were driven out of profound ideology. Nuff said.
     

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