The main plot of the story is this. Abigail is watching a movie with her friend when she noted that being controlled is fine as long as the person loves you. She also says how she would do anything to be taken away to a magical world. After her friend leaves a boy (who is not seen) steals her away. She awakes in a forest and hears the boy speaking to her through her mind. He tells her to obey him. If she disobeys she experiences intense pain (best way to explain it is like a cruciatus curse being cast on you). Throughout her journey she meets many odd creatures ( not that important) and a girl named Grace (very important). At the end of the story she reaches the boy. She finds that he's in love with her. She denies him and he lets her leave. (This is only the gist of the story, there's a lot more to it) Anyway I am in desperate need of a subplot. Any ideas? It needs to be kept in limits. This is actually a movie script, but it is in no way going to an actual producer or anything of that sort. My friends and I want to make it (and we are but teenagers with no experience) so it can't be completely out of this world. Thank you for any ideas you may give.
Well, let me see, a subplot. So perhaps a mental controversy about how she would want some controlling strong beautiful man to take her away to a beautiful place, and now she's in a strange forest being told to do things by a man, and she finds that she doesn't like that at all. A submissive vs. freedom kind of take on that.
Lets see; how about something like flashbacks of how/why this man fell in love with her. First meeting; what happened; what did she do to make him fall in love with her? Just some stuff to fill in any gapes that people may find in the story or answer any questions that it may rase.
How about the original friend in the real world trying to find her and learning about the 'otherworld' in the process? Might help a bit with exposition?
So what you've basically got is a story of a girl who must obey a boy, if she doesn't, he causes her pain... that sounds like a pretty hard sell and not a great lesson for young people (assuming by the magical elements, use of boy/girl, this is YA). Maybe you could have her become strong enough to withstand the punishments so she can stand up to the boy and tell him that he has no power over her, whether he loves her or not. That would be a great lesson for readers, that through friends (Grace?) and discovery of your self-worth (journeys through a magical land, trials/tribulations etc.) you can overcome an abuser. It seems fairly strange, from your description, that after whisking his love into another realm and punishing her for not obeying him, that he would just let her leave, why would he do that? Can she be the one who beats him instead of him letting her go?
Judging by the responses, it seems I need to add more information. The boy is in love with the girl, but he feels that controlling her is the best way for love; the need to control is pretty much a main point in his personality. The reason he lets her go in the end (which he will end up stating) Is that he knows he already has his claws in her, no matter how much she denys it, she loves him and even though she left, she is still his. I also want people to know that he is not an evil person, he is more...twisted. The guy is aiming for control through the pain, be he also wants her love. The whole thing is kind of him testing her, seeing how wiiling she is to obey him. I also want to state that I am not aiming for a 'lesson for the young people' that is the least of my concerns. There's no lesson to this at all; the movie is not to tell people to be strong and get out of abusive realtionships. It's just something I'm making because, the fact is, this will be interesting. And also, the subplot should actually be a minor plot going on. Like the creatures that live in the place are actually humans being turned into such by a strange monster. Or Grace has a big issue going on that needs to be solved. I thank the people who have previously answered.
