Hi Everybody, This is my first post, about my first novel. I don't have a group of friends I would show it to, and am to embarrassed to show my family, so I'm hoping that you guys might be able to help? Be as cruel or as kind as you like! The Plot: Our universe sits within an Omniverse (several universes co-existing), a fact we are unaware of. There are 7 universes each containing one planet supporting life. There are 3 good universes, 3 bad, and ours (earth). The Omniverse continues to exist because it is balanced. Earth is the only planet that truly knows nothing of the other dependant universes. We have true impartial balance because of this, which is important. The 3 good and the 3 bad universes/planets each have a council, a select group of representatives that know about the Omniverse and the need for balance (without the balance the Omniverse would implode and begin again). They cannot travel between worlds but can contact eachother via The Head Council, which consists of 2 people, a good woman called Deecho and a bad man called Navas (the Head Council is always this way). They can travel between worlds. There is an old fable about an object that existed centuries ago. This object was maintained by the Head Council and in the right hands brought peace and stability to the Omniverse. However, in the wrong hands it could destroy all universes except the holder's. The dark worlds were always seeking the power of the object, so the Head Council broke it into 7 pieces and hid one piece on each planet, knowing only they could travel to get them. They then purposefully destroyed any evidence and over time the object became myth. One of the worlds discovered a piece of the object, accidentally and began a quest to uncover the other pieces. They recruited the help of the secret scholars, The Sartoricus, elders that use old magic and could create Vexars, portals that only the Head Council can pass through to travel between worlds. The head council and others notice strange happenings and realise that somebody is travelling, a phenomenon they all thought impossible. The Head Council is replaced cyclically, by two people from earth that are 'chosen'. They are always made Good Woman/Bad Man by a process involving a 3rd person (again, balance). The Head Council believe in old prophecy and recognise that this is potentially the end of the Omniverse. They begin to believe in the object and know they must bring out the Chosen Ones to save all our worlds. But its too soon! There are 3 kids on earth, 16 yrs old. They are pulled from the earth by Deecho and Navas. Two of them are destined to become the Chosen Ones, they should have been brought out later, when the 3rd person has had an effect to make them Good Woman/Bad Man, but there isn't time. They are thrown into different worlds, creatures, magics, darkness and light. They must uncover the truth, who is seeking the object, what is it, what does it do? I have MANY twists and turns plotted already and an array of different species/people/places/backdrops to write against. Towards the end of the book, the Bad Man of the Head Council, Navas, kills the 3rd kid (Scott). There is another girl (Sarah) who's in love with Scott (they are a couple), and another boy (Daniel) who's secretly in love with Sarah. Navas makes it look as though Deecho killed Scott and in a twist, for the first time we get a Bad Woman on Head Council as Sarah vows to take revenge and becomes hell bent on finding the object as the evil people looking for it tell her it can bring him back (they want to use her powers). Daniel (who has always been a bit mean as opposed to the lovely Sarah) is then cast as Good Man who knows the object will not revive Scott and has to save Sarah from herself and save the omniverse in the process. In this first book (I think it'll end up 2 or 3) I explore the balance of good/bad, life/death, love/hate etc. It almost gives us a reason as to why things happen the way they do, seemingly so random. We meet the kids and go on their journey into the new worlds, the history of the Omniverse and all its wierd and wonderful inhabitants, untill they take their destiny as the Head Council. Its quite a dark fantasy novel. I realise this is probably all very convoluted but if it makes sense to you could you express an opinion? By the way, my Forum Name, Pondera, is also the title of the book, its the old Latin word for Balance or balanced thinking.
A story concept means nothing. I can tell you now, it has been done before. What matters is how you write it, the characterization, the flow, the imagery, all of it. There's no point to asking what other people think of the concept! They'll either say,"Sounds great," or, "it sounds like a ripoff of..." If the idea stirs you, write it. Then ask people what they think of the final story. After they tell you what they don't like about it, revise it, usually several times, until you're happy with it or until you throw up your hands and say the hell with it. Please read this thread about What is Plot Creation and Development? (and yes, this is a template post, which should give you an idea of how often this comes up.) Also, I removed the excerpt at the end. All material posted for critique MUST be inthe Review Room critiquing workshop, after meeting the minimum critiquing requirements.
It does look interesting, but pay heed to Cogito's template. It all teeters upon your own ability to write. Just do it. Don't ask us if it's 'good enough.' *You* are the only one that can make it good enough. And remember, you can always post a piece in the Novels section, but remember the reviewing rules.
The plot sounds very interesting, but like cog and kyle said, a great plot can only go so far, the real challenge is the writing. It does sound like your plot is going to be complex, and I would strongly suggest outlining the plot into chapters and books before you start writing, so that you don't get lost yourself. An outline is good for when you have a lot of plot points that must be hit to make sense, and it helps keep you from going off on tangents while writing, knowing that you have to get from point A to point B then to C and D...ect. Good luck, sounds like a great idea.
It sounds like a fine enough idea, but I'll tell you that I laughed because the religion I'm developing for my own book is called Omniversalism! No worries, though, quite entirely different apart that.
I like the plot, it could be a very interesting read if you're able to pull it off. Although this is just a brief overview, you seem to have a solid overview of your own creation and what it's about. My advice, for what it's worth, is that you stick to it and not get tempted to add too many new twists, turns or new angles - because the temptation to do so might come later when you've worked with the same story for a very long time. The plot sounds fresh and imaginative, I think. It will all depend on your style of telling.
It certainly sounds like you've really had quite a lot of fun with this already! I like ideas like this, but I'm a bit confused by something. On the one hand, you seem to have a clear idea of the outline, at least, of your story. However on the other hand - and correct me if I'm wrong - it doesn't look or sound like you've started writing it? If you like your own idea, explore it! In my own personal experiences rushing ahead with ideas for characters and the ending of the book tends to lead to confusion earlier on. Perhaps if you really started on the book you'd realise what needs to be revised and what needs to be, for want of a better word, streamlined? You have some interesting ideas, I think the best thing you can do now is just get down to it and start writing.
If you need help with an outline, I like the snowflake outlining method. I can't do linear type outlines, like we were taught in school to do. That's why I like this method. It caters to people like me, who tend to do things in a chaotic sort of way.
A concept will never excite me. If you speak the concept of any succesful book it won't sound great. It is how it is written. You can have the best idea in the world but it will be how you put it on paper that it will be judged by. Good luck
