My Golden Orb!

That's probably because I won't let you. I'm still alive, quickly crawl out of the ditch and tacle Bill. He starts crying like a little girl, and I give him some candy corn to shut him up.

At least i got my orb back again. Better not walk into another casino

 

As i wake from my coma i remember the distance sounds of a helicopter and a Gears style curb stomp. i get up and order the new orbfinder2009 which was graciously "pirated" by Jade i see CG walking by the hospital and quickly tie some sheets together. I tarzan Swing 20 stories and in the blink of an eye grab the orb from its hist and spin around the corner like spiderman.

MY ORB!!!!

 

As i wake from my coma i remember the distance sounds of a helicopter and a Gears style curb stomp. i get up and order the new orbfinder2009 which was graciously "pirated" by Jade i see CG walking by the hospital and quickly tie some sheets together. I tarzan Swing 20 stories and in the blink of an eye grab the orb from its hist and spin around the corner like spiderman.

MY ORB!!!!

 

I wake up in time to see soujiro swing past on a long rope of sheets. What the hell...

Quickly I leap to my feet and race up fifty flights of stairs to the top of a nearby office building. Then I realize that I don't have any rope. That doesn't hold me back for long.

I make a gigantic paperclip chain and swing out of the window. As we pass eachother, each chooses their weapon.

ROCK BEATS SCISSORS!

Soujiro: Aww, shucks.
Jade: You lost. Hand it over.

He hands me the orb and I continue on my way.

Yes this all happened in seconds.


MY ORB!

 

PAPER!

My golden orb!
(Also the shortest orb steal in the history of this thread )

 

Noooo!

I reach the top of my swing and start swinging backwards, just as soujiro does the same.

Jade: Gimme those goddamn scissors, souji!

I wrestle the scissors away from him and hold them triumphantly in the air. The first person I see with a rock may well find the scissors lodged in their nasal cavity.

I find CG and snip his paper into shreds. Then I take the orb and announce a ban on rocks.

My golden orb!

 

As i swing back into action for the third time i pass by Jade and manage to get caught up in my swinging bed stuff. She falls to the ground in an pile of white and cushions my fall. as i get up i fish out the orb and head back down the street. Jade wakes up in my sheets and asks herself what happened.

MY ORB!!!

 

star walkes out from the casino, counting her winnings. a royal mess greets her eyes. bedsheets and bodies are shrewn across the area, but the glint of the golden orb is no where in sight.
"damn, i need to stop getting sidetracked."
pocketing her new spending money, star glances down the street. souji is strolling along the sidewalk without a care in the world, caressing the golden orb. gritting her teeth in anger, star runs down the road and confronts him.
star: "gimme that!" *wrestles orb from souji's hands*
souji: "no way!" *grabs orb back*
suddenly, the orb slips from both their hands and begins rolling down the graveled street. it bounces over a pothole before a passing semi comes past.
"NO" star screams, fearing for the orb. the force of the semi picks up the surprising light orb and tosses it into its cargo. leaping, star hurls herself at the semi and grabbs onto the back.

*evil laugh* my orb!

 

you get a flat tire and you walk away looking for help
carelessly, you left the orb behind and me driving notices it so i pick it up and drive away

 

But you don't manage to get far, considering you have a flat tire as well (I picked up my own pair of siccors, just in case someone has paper). I take my time to load the large caliber cannon with a load of abandoned rocks (seems everyone fears Jade and her siccors) and light the fuse. The truck gets barraged, and I run over to the wreckage and start looking for the orb.

After a while, I find it, shining like never before. Shiny is mine, once again!

 

But when you pick it up, the guy from "Back To The Future" suddenly pops out of nowhere and runs over you, and you drop the orb. The driver peers out and mutters a quick "oh crap" and disappears. I recover and pick the orb up

 

Three seconds after I get back to my feet and realise the orb is gone (damned), the DeLorean appears again, with future me driving.

CG: Hey.
Future CG: Hey. Got your orb back.
CG: Whow thanks. What happened to BatCountry?
Future CG: It involved the past, New York and a giant blimp. It wasn't a pretty sight.

He steps in again and dissappears, leaving me with the orb

 

"I'm sick of these mother $£%!ing people taking my mother $£%!ing orb!!" Othman screamed at the top of his voice and he shot at a nearby window...as it happened CG and Future CG were both standing behind the tinted glass and luckily it wasn't bulletproof! FCG disappeared upon impact with the bullet but to get to him it had to travel through CG's head, thus killing him and depleting him of any possible future, luckily the orb is too shiny to care about such things and stayed right where it was.

My orbling!!

 

as i finish narrating the part about how othman came into possession of the orb i enter the scene and announce with a giant booming voice.

souji: the orb master is here!

everyone including CG less than animated corpse bows down and the orb shyly rolls away from othman who is awe of this great orb wielding power wets the floor. Me and the orb leave the room and noone moves until i reach my birthplace in Bulawayo where no one is sure to find me.

giant booming voice says: MY ORBB!!

 

double post!!!

 

CommonGoods, you're time has not yet come
You're late Joe.
Sorry, had a crisis meeting. Blue monday is one of the bussiest day's of the year
Yeah yeah, let's get this over with. By the way, what happened to the size of those lettres?
Financial crisis
Right

So, I live once more, and I'm really thinking about buying that bulletproof skull. So, where am I? Zimbabwe? Are you freaking kidding me?!

Bulawayo? Sounds like some kind of evil BBQ-sauce. Well, anyway, I want that golden orb back... Luckily, in Zimbabwe, anything can be bought, so after buying myself some consoles (PS3, XBOX 360, WII), I start asking around if anyone has seen that orb.

Soon after, I find Souji who is just leaving the airport. I point at him and yell "Rich famous American!" He get's stormed by the crowd, and I use the confusion to sneak in and steal the orb.

Three days later I'm in Amsterdam, my birthplace. And next to me lies my precious golden orb

 

After i officially ban google search from CG's IP i follow the paper trail of drool that always comes about when CG has the orb. I find myself in Amsterdam not a few days later and after some awesome local brownies i go searching for CG.

I find him at his hideout and enter the area disguised like a Rastafarian. I enter his chamber and in the spirit of the season we sm...eat some brownies. We get so...um...stuffed that Cg goes streaking and leaves the orb to me!

My Orb!!!!MAN!

 

"Right ... that was lame." Othman commented as he used google earth to find the bright glow that emanates from the Orb.

Othman flew in a secret Concord (the last one still in use) to Amsterdam and got a taxi to the house he used to live in and after sneaking past the current tenants into the cellar where I locked up all my guns I selected all that may be of use.

Locked and loaded, Othman mounted his prototype motorbike (these tenants are awesome) and went on his way at a shocking one hundred and seventy five miles an hour yet still in only third gear!! Arriving quickly at CG's house and recruit Cutecumber to come and help me defeat Souji.

"Souji...you had a little too many brownies didn't you?" Othman murmured at the sleeping ball of fat. He leant over Souji looking for the orb, and as he straightened up with a scowl on his face he saw it. It was his pillow!! "Now...how do I do this?" He asked absentmindedly, CC replied by taking a sub machine gun out of one of the two dozen holsters and filled souji full of holes.
"There!"
"Umm...thanks CC...I think..." Me and CC were now bonded by trauma....I think...

Our Orb!

 

Dude... this stuff is awm... awsm... *starts giggling* funny word...

When I wake up, I am happy to see the golden orb is till there.

*two hours earlier*
CG: Damned, Othman has my orb... and he recruited my little sister? Heh.
*logs in on his sisters account*
*shoots Othman*
*puts the orb next to a sleeping CG*
*logs out*

 

"That was even lamer ..." Othman said trailing off as he absentmindedly pulled a bullet out of his bulletproof skull. He got up off the floor and picked up CC's gun, "Damn this thing i a beast!!" He pulled the hammer back and pointed it at the offline CC. Unfortunately for her she seemed to not of invested in a bulletproof vest and her head now had a gaping hole in her forehead.

Skipping towards the light Othman entered CG's room and shot him in the head..."There's too many of these bulletproof skulls about!!" CG rolled over and started to snore, Othman sighed and grabbed the orb and skipped off to stand in front of some tramps and say; Your time has come, little hobbit!

 

BatCountry wakes up confused and his butt is sore. What the heck happened? he wondered, and that was when he noticed... zombies were crawling over the place. "HOLY CRAP!" he yelled and started running, the zombie mob started chasing him. BatCountry apparently inherited some Usain Bolt genes and he ran off into the light and... crashed into a smug othman knocking othman into the ground and rendering him unconscious. "Wow," BatCountry said, "that's gotta be on my top 10 weirdest things" But no matter, BatCountry picked up the orb and ran away.

 

BRAAAAAINS!

CommonGoods curses under his breath. Surrounded by freaking zombies. "Shoo, go away. I don't taste good!" Seems it isn't working... Maybe try a different approach. "Golden Orrrrrrrb!"

The zombies look at each other (at least, the one who have eyes do), then stare at me. "Brains?" I shake my head. Golden Orb."

Seems it's working. The zombies crown me king and help me track down BatCountry. After they steal the golden orb for me, I let them eat his body

My golden orb (and my zombie army!)

 

Xeno, back from a long visit to Risa (Jamohoran!) breaks through the stratosphere, shattering every window in a sixty-mile radius. He hits the ground before the broken glass, and spies the Golden Orb in the hands of his age-old enemy, CommonGoods. Without hesitating, he uses his new blade to slice through the hoards of zombies as they claw uselessly at his armour. CommonGoods backs into a corner, and Xeno unleashes his plasma cannons in CG's general direction.
The zombies turn, seeing CG's body, and scream "Barbeque!"

Xeno walks away with the orb, triumphant.

XENO IS BACK!

 

I appear at the scene of the massacre and trade barbecue sauce for information.

Jade: The orb, where did it go.

Zombies: Mmm brains... and sauce...

After a few minutes, I can’t make any sense of them. Then I see xeno walking away with my orb. I take the lid of the barbecue sauce and throw it at him. Immediately he is charged by a horde of hungry zombies.

I pick up the orb and try to clean the barbecue sauce off. I decide to go and get it cleaned. My precious orb in such a state. It’s no wonder it prefers me.

My Orb!

 

I see Jade enter a dry cleaning store from across the street. my agents are in place and begin chattering on the radio about her movements.

agent1: she's at the counter.
agent2: no, at the desk!
agent1: what's the difference?
Souji: Shaddup and get her she's coming out.

As jade comes out onto the side walk a van pulls up beside her and two anonymous men push her into the opening door but do such a poor job of it that they slam her head into the passenger door. I massage my head as i head into the van. The van shakes for a moment. there are a few screams from within and then the van starts to move. but it only goes 50ft before Jade is explelled with a firm boot. a pair of hands reach out and take the orb as she holds her beaten head as the van speeds away.