1. DeathandGrim

    DeathandGrim Senior Member

    Dec 28, 2012
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    Virginia Beach

    My greatest restraint

    Discussion in 'General Writing' started by DeathandGrim, Feb 28, 2013.

    My greatest restraint is the fact that I always want one and only one result out of things

    I have a tendency to overdo things until they meet a standard that sanity would probably deem impossible and if it doesn't meet this certain standard I never finish the work

    So I guess you can say I suffer from perfectionism and often when it comes to my writing (if you've seen any previous topics of mine) I'm never ever satisfied and I hate it because I have this paranoia that something is always not good enough, offensive, bad, nonsense, etc. and I end up taking stuff out that was probably good or even better than what I do but I'm so paralyzed by my fear of not being good enough.

    One of my strangest habits which after trawling these forums many readers would find offensive is over-describing things. While I'm slowly easing myself out of this habit I tend to describe things down the color of teeth to the precise degree of motion in a body part and at first I thought "yea I'm being a descriptive writer" but I realize I might as well be writing an essay if that's the route I wanna take and readers want to use their imagination not read a pamphlet

    But yea that's my biggest issue, I want to be perfect on one side but on the side of sanity I know that's impossible. It's annoyingly draining.
  2. cazann34

    cazann34 Active Member

    Sep 18, 2012
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    Scotland, UK
    Ah! you're a perfectionist, like me.

    You need to listen to the 'angel' within you and not the 'devil'. The devil is goating you into negative thinking, he's telling you you're no good, he is your self doubt. Swat him off your shoulder and only listen to the angel. She/he is you postive side, your 'that is a job well done' side.

    I read in a book (can't remember its title) about de-stressing your life and one think that has stayed with me is this quote: Perfection is an unattainable illusion' I remind myself of this every time I start obsessing about the little things that can't be improved on.
  3. Bimber

    Bimber New Member

    Jan 20, 2013
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    currently in Africa
    If it helps you write and keep your sanity than go for it, if you want to write 10 pages describing someones foot even go for it if it will help you keep on writing. Thats whats editing for, when you finish your book leave it for sometime even few weeks or months is ok, than start to edit stuff and cut stuff out and think what the reader needs to know and what was just for you so you could get into the character and the story.
    The reason i suggest to leave it for sometime is most often if you edit right away you still feel strong about what you wrote and like it and makes sense to you, but after a time when you cool off you can look at it from another angel.

    Try it and hope it helps every writer has there own way
  4. The Tourist

    The Tourist Banned

    Mar 27, 2012
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    I know the feeling. My version of OCD regards implements--tools, machinery, guns, knives, the leather I wear. They must be pristine at all times.

    (It's snowing where I am, and there is salt. But is you look at my eleven year old boots they look brand new. Saddle soap and Rossi boot wax.)

    But I'm getting better. Here's something that might help.

    Let's suppose you're a fanatic about clean kitchens--and I used to be that way, too. Take a big soup spoon, dip it in gravy, and leave it dead-center in the middle of a counter or kitchen table. Give yourself permission to go run some errands.

    You might wince upon leaving, but two things will happen. One, after a surprising few minutes you'll forget about the spoon, and in fact, you'll also be surprised when you first see it coming home.

    Second, the world didn't end. You realize all of the time and fret you have expended for other meaningless things. Heck, 98% of the people you meet aren't worth the oxygen to talk with. In fact, when I get insulted I know I'm doing my job as a human.

    Baby steps. Maybe a clean spoon first. LOL.

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