My story is basically a Romeo and Juliet-type thing, please don't laugh. Two rival gangster families. Ramona and Devon have been flirting for years, but never go further than that. I want them to give in eventually, but I need a good reason why, after so long. They're supposed to despise each other, they can't let the other know they're in love, so they put on a front, if you know what I mean. I was never good at writing really passionate scenes. The only thing I can come up with is that Devon sees Ramona with someone else and just lashes out. She goes to see him later and so on, so forth... Any other suggestions would be most welcome.
I bet this is a question you can figure out for yourself if you put yourself into the setting of the story. So what is the setting? What events might occur in this kind of setting that would enable them to have to be around each other often to the point that they would eventually give in? Also, work on character development. Who are these 2 people? You need to flesh them out into 3-D so that you can develop voices for them. Looking again at what you've got up there, it's so vague & cliche as to be almost -0-. Spend more time working on the bones of your story. Good luck.
i'm guessing you're way too young to know that 'ramona' is the name of the girl in a classic 1930s film version of a classic 1880s novel that's an indian/whiteman version of the romeo and juliet plot...
It has been done before, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't continue. Just write it and make it your own. There are many things you can do to make them realize how the other one feels. A few I can think of are- The main guy can see the main girl in trouble and help her. (Mugging, unwanted advances) or the other way around. I think it would be better actually if she helped him in some way. I may be wrong to assume but I imagine a girl growing up in a family of gangsters would be alright throwing down when needed, especially if she were the only girl lol. Just my opinion...
Nor only that, but West Side Story as well. Of course it's been done before. It's a classic theme. The motivation is obvious. They love each other. Their love is a visceral thing, whereas the feud between their families is obligation, and has little or no relevance to what they feel. Why would you need a different motivation?
Thanks for the tips. Btw, I'm not planning to send this story away to a publisher or anything, I just enjoy writing stories for myself. I didn't know that about the name Ramona. Go me!
It's been done many times before, but so has crime stories with alcoholic detectives. Doesn't matter - it's a genre classic.
Basically the way I see it if I was in your situation, Lorrs, is write out a FULL background of each of the characters--even things that won't show up in your story, i.e habits, family tree, friends, thoughts, emotional/mental history, physical/sexual history, and so on. That way, when you write up to the scene that causes your main characters to give in, you'll already know why because it's their character to do so for whatever reason. Hope that helps! Love Romeo and Juliet- type sotries
