So, I was having this very interesting conversation with someone about trauma. Assuming that "trauma" is something that affects the individual that carries it in their everyday life, from a severe type of trauma like ptsd to a less severe one like abandonment issues, do you believe that a (willing) person truly ever heals after a traumatic event has occurred and if so, what's your definition of "healing"? The person I was conversing with was a psychologist. At some point I asked her, "How can someone be sure to know that he overcame his trauma? Does it truly ever leave?" and she answered, "Well, in my pov, people don't overcome. They adapt." With that said, I understood what she meant but then again, how does a person know that he indeed worked efficiently on his issues, made day-to-day beneficial steps to better his life, instead of brushing things off and being in denial of the severity of his trauma, just because he believes that he is on the right path, which at some point might manifest again by blowing up in his face? Well, with this and that, the conversation ended up with "changes" and that's where I got some very interesting information. In general, I told her that I don't believe that people change. Indeed, they adapt; but when it comes to trauma, let's say a severe traumatic experience which leads you at some point to a complete melt down, is the exception that someone might drastically change. She agreed. Then, I went further on asking if the reverse can occur, meaning that the person that already suffers let's say from ptsd, is starting to "adapt" again in his life; who will he be in this life, since his experience has already changed him so much, even after he "heals". Then she said that people do change during shock or really tough periods, but after the shock is over they return to their original behaviours and mannerisms. I find this very weird and fascinating, but also kind of destressing. For me at least, it kind of highlights the fact that we can't escape ourselves. For example, let's say that I have some core characteristics which I don't like. I am very conscious about them and I want to change them. Become a "better" person and put the effort in. With the above said, whatever I do or whichever way I try to shift my philosophy, or feelings, or pov, I can't because somethings just can't be divided into steps or percentages. For example you can't partially forgive someone. Either you truly do or you don't. You can't partially feel compassion towards someone or... you get what I mean. Some internal things just can't be divided or counted. I'd love to hear your opinions and experiences upon these matters. Do you believe that people change and if so, in which way and how? How much control do we have as individuals in our internal growth? Do you think that people overcome or adapt? What are your definitions upon "healing"?