Hell, I remember when color TV came out. In the USA. And it was awful. Pink people, green people, blue people. The Brits were smart enough to wait till the technology improved ...and their colour TV is/was excellent. Like being at the movies.
Remember when black-and-white kindles were all the rage, and hella expensive? Now, they're 50 bucks! And now there's Kindle Fire, Kindle Paperwhite....
I'm actually really happy that there are terms like cisgender, genderqueer, heteronormative etc. I'm not happy about how narcissistic people hijack identity politics, but I'm not happy about narcissistic people in general. I don't think it's a fault of identity politics. Below you can find sarcastic "remember whens" I'm writing in general response to some posts in here I find annoying: Remember when certain people, based on how they looked, were forced to make my life easier? Those were the days (for people who look like me). Remember when straight people got to dominate 100% of the conversation about what healthy sexuality was? Those were the days (for straight people like me). etc You get the point (unless you don't).
Remember your first banana after rationing, watching the coronation or welcoming West Indian folk down at Southampton docks, the Empire Windrush, your first shebeem? A visit to the Mary Stopes clinic, Champion the Wonder Horse, or Yanks with their gum, their nylons, prophylactic intercourse, a michelin johnny?
I like your writing, Mat. It's very oldschool. I can imagine a lot of people find it difficult in this day and age, though.
Remember pay toilets? You had to put a dime in the slot to get in? "Here I sit, broken hearted, Paid my dime and only farted. Next time I won't take a chance, I'll keep my dime and shit my pants."
Remember when the internet was crazy about Chuck Norris being invincible and ridiculous? (Reminder: Chuck Norris doesn't sleep -- he waits.)
No J, the game is to see how archaic we can get with the references: Remember Sarah Bernhardt, the Marquis of Salisbury, that foul business and Oscar in prison, and then the world turned upside down, the Kaiser, babies in Belgium butchered, bring the boys back home I said but nobody listened. At least we have phrenology, eugenics, Sigmund Freud. Those were the days, my flapper dresses.
Look baby, I wrote you some prose: 'Oh my @123456789, has it really been three years?' said @matwoolf 'Yes darling, every moment a poetry in our eyes.' 'Together,' 'As one.' 'But then again, very crammed in this cupboard.' 'Your feet stink.' 'Your face makes me shit!' The heroes' cupboard hurtled through space. All at once a body emerged from the doorway, flapped among clouds. @123456789 a baby pigeon to some, reached with his wings, he spread and soared, free at last of the toxic confinement. 'Fuck you, @MatWoolf,' he said, 'I shall fly alone, solo pen, pilot licenced nnnnnnn rat a tat at ata tat.' ''Tora Tora Tora,' said Mat Woolf, the cupboard crashing splinters to the ground, ummm.
Darn tootin' I remember Capone, back befo' he got into all that highfalutin' business wit maabstahs. Punk would come into Dino's Pizzeria like a big shot, start talkin wit the boys and order some calzones witout payin', leavin' the resta us to foot the bill. But the waitresses told us he was a louse, never wore deodorant, and was self-caanshis of his pudgy face, like he had to make some kinda ah-pology. Crazy sunuvabitch wanted to make a real point, you see, 'bout who he really was once he got some flashy clothes. Gives me migraines to think ovvit.
