Screams of Silence, Cries Unheard: The Story of Rita Landow

This was my point, actually. The 'publisher' you've chosen (PA) has decided to charge such high prices for simple paperback books that nobody will buy them. (Over $35 for one of yours.) If you want to start selling your books, you'll need to re-think your choice of publisher.

I've just checked JK Rowling's books on Amazon just now. ALL of her Harry Potter books are selling for well under $10 each. Even her new novel is under $14, which is near enough the price of her Harry Potter-related books like the cookbook, etc. The entire box set of 7 Harry Potter books is $58.50. That's $8.36 per book. And she's a best-selling author.

I'm going to back off this thread for now, as I feel I've more or less made my point. It's up to you, of course. Feel free to stick with PA if you like. But they are a dodgy outfit, no mistake.

 

...read my notes again... i did not say the date should be on a separate page, only that the dedication should be... and that the dates in the dedication do not have the required space after the comma...

...i said the chapter should begin on a separate page...

...as for the date above the text on the first page of the first chapter, i only said the date should not be in italics...

...then you haven't read as many books by well-known authors as i have, since i have seen it done both ways... i agree this can be optional, so i erred in not adding that...

...where did i even mention doing anything in bold?... song lyrics are not normally put in italics and they are not centered, but are inserted as block indents, which means with left margin aligned and the right margin ragged, indented 10 spaces in on both sides...

...the kindle version should still have the proper space separating parts that appear on a new page...

...then you should have insisted on it being corrected...

...neither of them, as unknown new writers submitted first books that long... few to no total strangers are going to buy/read a book that long from a writer they've never heard of... especially when the characters are animals acting as humans and the price is so ridiculously high for a paperback by an unknown author...

...which is why you must be more careful in choosing a publisher... what good does it do you to have a book put out by a publisher who charges so much for it that no one will buy it?...

imo [and in the opinion of many professional critics], patterson is not an especially good writer, just a very popular one... and i certainly would never classify any of his novels as the 'best on the market'...

i don't see how you can say his style of writing is in any way similar to yours...

your comment about reading to become a better writer is a given, so i don't know what that has to do with anything we're discussing here...

 

I may very well have been in a bad mood when I read your post, so I more than likely misread a lot of the things you said. I admit that there are a lot of things in the novel that can be taken out. Not only would this make the novel shorter, but it would also help the flow of the story. I think the best thing to do is to heavily edit the novel and submit it to an agent. As I am highly devoted to these characters, I could very easily start writing children books using them.

You make a good point regarding James Patterson. Just because someone is on the New York Times bestseller list all the time does not in any way say anything about your writing ability. I seem to think his writing is similar to mine because my style of writing is very simplistic and, at least from what I can tell, so is his.

 

...unfortunately, since you have already self-published the book and it's 'out there' no agent will take it on because no publisher will be interested in a self-published book unless it's selling like hotcakes...

...i suggest taking another look and comparing any page of his prose with any page of your own... while his writing may be seen as 'clear and concise' it is not at all 'simplistic' in the way that yours is, as your writing 'voice' in this book seems to be aimed at connecting with children, not adults...

...so, if you want to write for the adult market, you will have to raise your phrasing up to an adult level... or, as you're so devoted to the characters, why not write some stories featuring them, but with plots and subject matter more suitable for children?...

 

I have considered taking these characters and writing books for children with them. The ironic twist about this is that I generally do not like kids and honestly, talking animals has been so overdone in literature and the media in general that most kids are pretty much getting sick and tired of them. You are probably correct in stating that the novel probably won't be picked up by an agent since it's already published. However, I'm hoping that I can get an agent to help me promote it and whatnot. Really, the reason why I want to republish is because there is a lot of extraneous crap in the story that really slows it down. (For example, there are a few chapters dedicated to the characters going camping. This was from another story and was merely used so that the main character and his mentor could spend some more time together and get to know each other better.) What you suggest would be a good idea: take work from someone else such as J.K. Rowling or Stephen King, and compare my work to theirs and then try to imitate their phrasing in my own work. Personally, I think Founders' Island could be a good coming-of-age movie, but selling it to a studio would be far too difficult, especially considering the subject matter and the fact that a majority of the cast are indeed animals. I could very easily just change the title of the book, edit it heavily, and try to get an agent interested in it, but I think it's best if I just focus on other novels at the moment, such as Screams of Silence, Cries Unheard and Summer of My Existence (the title of the latter needs work, in my opinion).

 

agents don't do that for anyone but their clients whose books they've sold to paying publishers, smitty...

for that kind of service, you have to pay a publicist...

that helps to explain the inflated size of the book... and yes, you're right about taking out all such filler gluck..

that last part is not what i suggested... you should never try to imitate another writer's 'voice'... you must develop your own... what i said to do was to only 'compare' their writing to yours, so you can see that your writing style in this book seems to be aimed at children, not adults... it's too much a 'see spot run' voice, instead of the more complex and interesting phrasing one finds in an adult market novel...

no one in the film industry will but film rights to a book unless the book itself is a bestseller, or the story is a 'high concept' that is original enough to have good box office potential... and yours is neither, sorry to say...

...a wise move, imo... and you're right about the title...

hugs, maia

 

Yes, you are correct. A publicist is responsible for publicity for the book.

Like I said, there is a lot taht I could remove from the novel to help it flow better.

Imitating another's work is quite common in English classes, at least from my experience.

Yes, the idea of being stranded on an island has been done to death, but I haven't come across anyone who's done it with an evil dictator wanting to use another's intelligence against them.

I'm glad to see that you at least agree with me about the last point. LOL I was expecting you to be against it.

 

Honestly, I find this somewhat personally offensive, though I thank you for being honest. I could see you saying this after having read the entire novel, but to my knowledge, you have not. My guess is that you read the synopsis, a few excerpts from the Kindle version of the novel, and simply wrote off the novel as being mediocre and not having a very good plot. I suggest reading more of the novel before coming to a conclusion such as this. If we were to write off the Harry Potter or the My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic series as mere "entertainment for kids", then we would not have fallen in love with those series to begin with had we not given them a chance to look beyond their child-like appearance.

 

how is it personally offensive to say what's true?... your book is not a bestseller, is it?... and the story is not what filmmakers consider a 'high concept'... nor are any of the plot elements very original, since they're dealt with in many novels and films... plus, nothing i said was 'personal'... it all related only to the book itself, not to you...

i have read much more than that... i based my conclusions/opinions on the copious amount of info you provided in this thread, plus all the story notes you sent me, as well as having scanned the parts available online... which was more than enough to have informed those opinions...

those are not valid comparables, since despite rowling not being an exceptional writer, she at least wrote in a more 'adult' style than your book is written in and the pony books are aimed only at children, do not present themselves as novels for the adult market, which you do with your book...

i'm sorry you are so unhappy with my attempts to help you... i assumed you came to me privately for an honest assessment of your work and advice on how it could be upgraded... that is what i provided... you don't have to take my advice, or agree with it...

 

I don't recall sending you any notes regarding Founders' Island.

It's generally held that Rowling didn't start writing in a more adult style until the fourth book, hence why some fans only like the first three books because of their lighthearted adventurous tone, while others like the last four books because of their darker and edgier tone. Rowling generally started writing for children. As for My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, the show has garnered quite an adult fanbase. Yes, the show is generally aimed at kids, but it can also be aimed at adults as well, just like SpongeBob SquarePants in its first three seasons.

 

you're right... the notes were on another of your books... but i did check out the book on amazon, which is what i based my assessment of the writing style on, as well as my remarks re marketing...