she is so hot that

I'll stay on the (not so easily offended) fence. I think he's writing a story for one (poss not expressing his own views but that of his character (it could be set in 90's even)) and (sorry @alpacinoutd ), for two, he hails from a different culture (not the 2020 Western world (this I have deduced)). Peace out man.

I like @jannert 's best. Short and on point.

 

Staying with the seductive food theme of the OP:

You are so hot I want to smother you all over my chicken wings!

 

I feel this thread might be fast turning into the Bad Chat Up Lines Thread, which would be hilarious

 

You're so hot, it must be because of your methane emissions. I mean CO2.

 

You're so hot that being around you during the summer is very unpleasant. The heat which emanates from your body serves as a superfluous heating agent which only exacerbates the excessive heat which the sun is already emitting. However, during the winter, I am all too grateful for your presence because that is the time most appropriate to have nearby a source of great heat.

 

You're so hot you've put the stove out of business.

 

You're so hot that merely standing in your vicinity gave me third degree burns, permanently scarring my face and hands and requiring a lengthy hospital stay.

 

You're so hot, I'm not touching you unless I wear oven gloves.

 

Native speaker or not - I think the big problem is the clunky English. It's not lame for the sake of lame - it's sounds like an AI they've tried teach how to write cheesy chat up lines. Or like an alien trying to disguise as a human.

That said - if the entire joke is:
"I need a stove."
"You're so hot you don't need a stove!"
Then of course you'll need a food reference and while a pick up line like that will always be lame and cheesy, it could work in your story.

A certain scene form Hot Shots comes to mind, though...

"A stove? You're so hot you could probably cook a full English breakfast on that body of yours!"

 

You're so hot that you don't need a stove for your buns, hun.

 

You are so hot that the internal temperature of your body equates to a safe to eat barbequed sausage

 

Of course it's meant as a joke! Obviously, the male character is not expecting the female character to fall head over heels for him and then conceive his children after being subjected to this kind of silly flirting and hearing a lame-ass pickup line! And my question is how lame is it, meaning how lame the male character is gonna come off as after saying something like that.

 

There's something about this that's so lame, it's like how much more lame could this be? And the answer is none. None more lame.

 

It's lame but I agree with the above poster there is a robotic/alien vibe that I don't know is intentional. If your character is kind of a mathetmatics/science nerd, that would work. You could even have him maybe making notes of good pick lines and trying to write one like a science equation or something. That could be funny.

 

You are so hot that a war is being waged inside my soul between my primeval bestiality and my civilised nature.

 

You're so hot, would you mind using your face to iron my shirts?

 

This thread is hilarious Please, don't stop!!

 

You're so hot, you're hotter than a very hot thing that's been heated up to make it extra hot.

 

You are so hot, darling, I do not even need to drink coffee out of a thermos flask when I stand next to you.

 

You are so hot that you are contributing to a rise in average global temperatures.

If you can't beat them, join them