The Baseless Lies Game

^ is the man in charge of supplying wood for the students of all the schools in Nashville. He is constantly amazed at how how guitars they seem to produce.

 

^ continues to PM me asking me to serenade him with those guitars.

 

^ Pronounces it GEE-tar. And then says YA-HOO! Wears a cowboy hat everywhere, even to weddings and funerals. And for years, he thought a serenade was a drink made by a girl named Sara.

(T&W) ^ Actually has done a study and determined the answer to the question,"How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood." I know, because he needed a Chuck for his experiment. Peppermint Patty referred me. T&W's findings will be published in an upcoming issue of Woodchuck Quarterly.

 

Let's go down to the floor where CharlieVer has a message for his family.

"Is this my good side Or Thi . . .

--You're on!

Hey, ya'll it's me. We've been mostly staying out of trouble except for our dog Brutus here who almost tore off a little boy's arm.

No, no. He's going to be just fine.

They were able to save the arm.
It's just gonna be a few inches shorter than the other is all."

 

^^has a vendetta against all the other members because someone stole his coat and won't own up. Since everyone seems to be happy about this he's concluded that it is a conspiracy.

 

^ knows where the coat is and has named the small family of beavers that now reside in it The Mathers.

 

^ wanted to buy a beaver coat but could only find the "Big and Tall" men's clothing store and nothing would quite fit him. Is now aspiring to build a "Tall and Weird" clothing chain so he and all his multiple personalities can shop there.

 

^ Ingests large amounts of colloidal silver to stay "healthy"

 

^ Is bigfoot's nephew twice removed. Have photos to prove it.

 

^ (Prometheus) Tried to slip the "colloidal silver" amendment into the health care bill, which appeared to provide funding for colloidal silver treatment, but in actuality, would have forced Congress to send all the silver in the United States directly to his address. It didn't fly though, thanks to the careful eye of Dennis Kucinich.

^ (Nathan) Tried to insert that "bigfoot removal" amendment into the healthcare bill, that appears to fund foot-reduction surgery for those with severely large feet, but actually funds the search for Bigfoot. This one made it through, and will be part of the final bill that goes up for a vote. The strange part is that the government secretly knows that that was the purpose of the amendment, and it will actually help control healthcare costs as Bigfoot DNA splicing is expected to cure many ailments at a fraction of the cost.

 

Is currently driving to south Boston with five cases of stolen Irish whiskey, wearing nothing more than green body paint.

 

^ Is driving to Ireland with Boston whiskey. Having trouble getting directions to the bridge.

 

Is frantically PM-ing me trying to catch a lift. Claims to have driven that bridge several times.

 

^ was horrified to learn that the bridge was actually a rainbow and the truck was one of the old Leprechaun flatbeds.

 

^ Got across the rainbow by clicking his heels and saying "There's no place like home, there's no place like home, there's no place like home." But not before knocking down a scarecrow, ripping the head off a tin man, and shooting a lion, all while the Leprechaun were singing some "Ding, dong" song about a dead witch.

 

^wrote the "Ding Dong" song for the original film and was very upset when changed the word to "witch" from..well...another word that was just as apropo though less censor friendly

 

^ Thinks everything and everyone should have a censor filter.

 

I ran my "Charlie Brown censor scanner" that turns all regular cursing into comic strip cursing over Becca's ( ^ ) latest manuscript. Here's the first line:

@#$$%!! #$%%^& @@$%& &^^#$!!!

The whole book pretty much goes like that.

 

^ read my cussing book and thought it was an instructional on how to pick up women. He can't understand why they all hit him. But then he remembered in chapter three, he read about women that liked to be spanked, but not in those exact words.....

So, he slaps all the women on the butt after they hit him. When he tries to explain this to the judge and blame it all on me they lock him in a phsyc ward.

All he does now is walk around and cuss about me and say he just wanted to get lucky.

 

^ Likes to be spanked by cartoon characters. We had some thrilling moments. I only went to the psych ward when I became upset after finding out about her fling with Hagar the Horrible.

 

^ gets insanely excited about spanking people, expecially other men. He likes the shocked looks on their faces. It turns him on.

 

^ Loves to see me excited in new and fascinating ways. She wants me to spank the Beagle next.

 

^ wants to video me spanking the beagle so he can watch it over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over, and over.

 

^ Means something else when she says "beagle." Sort of like "monkey."

 

^ thinks everyone is speaking in a code that only he knows. His 'code' twists everything we say into something twisted and naughty for his own pleasure and entertainment.