Been mulling over making this thread for a while; the MC of my WIP (seeing as how the VP's such a VIP, wouldn't it be best to keep the PC on the QT lest the VC find out and make us all MIA?) is gay. I've made this decision based on the fact that I like bending tropes, and the idea that's been going around regarding underrepresented people (people of color, LGBT, handicapped, etc) of "What if the character belonged to one of those groups but that wasn't the point of the story?" So, he's gay, but this isn't an M/M romance, or a sex story, it's an urban fantasy. There won't be any overtly sexual content in it, nor would there be if he was straight. However, I'm going for a noir voice, so he's going to be appreciative of what he sees as eye candy. To pull an example from Charles Bukowski, "As usual Carmen was wearing a very tight knitted dress that fit her like a balloon fits the trapped air, maybe tighter." On, finally, to my question. Gay guys (and straight women. Androphiles?) aside from the very stereotypical (washboard abs, chiseled jawlines, [REDACTED] inch [REDACTED]) what do you find superficially/physically attractive in a man? I realize that not everyone's tastes are the same, but one thing that I heard from a IRL gay friend that surprised me was that he found armpits very attractive. He said that he thought it stemmed from a common male pose with the arms raised up over the head. It makes sense, but it never would have occurred to me. I'm just looking for suggestions on what my MC might notice as he looks around the room, nothing too explicit, but if you'd prefer to answer by PM rather than in the open forum, I understand completely.
I think the armpit deal is partially a musk thing, as well. Doesn't do it for me, but I've heard that. I tend to notice hands. Long-fingered piano-player looking hands or more square, sturdy ones. It's about being distinctive, I think. You can imagine what different hand types would be better at accomplishing. Just personal taste, but I'm a fan of long hair. Depending on what type of guys your dude's into he might find someone who puts obvious effort into something like hair and skin care ridiculous, or maybe he appreciates a nice coif. Ditto clothing. Your guy's a bit of a conman, part-time, right? So he can probably spot someone who's got money by their style, to some degree. Question is, is he attracted to nicely-tailored clothes and expensive fashion, or does he just think, "Mark"?
Disclaimer: no ab-mountains or marble-chin for me, please. Not into armpits either but I find strong arms and shoulders attractive. Not overly muscular, more like the "toned from use" type, if that makes any sense. It's got something to do with the suggestion of strength and activity I think. (You know the hassle of changing positions during sexy time? If your partner can take care of that for you... how can't that be hot ) Maybe your MC could notice the movement of muscle under clothing if that's his thing. Also, this. And I've heard that from quite a lot of women and gay/bi men, it seems to be fairly common. Another thing is posture. How a person carries himself (because we're talking men) will affect how he's perceived by others - confident, introvert, sly, etc. Slouching shoulders probably won't win many looks. Again personal taste here, but I tend to notice how a guy interacts with people around him. If he's showing certain behaviour (such as talking over others frequently, possessive or intrusive body language, generally "macho" behaviour and way of speaking) I'll find him less attractive because that suggests he's acting on an ideal of masculinity I'm averse to.
You could go with the category labels - twinks, bears, cubs, otters et al. That would make it comprehensible for people who know the vernacular, and gives you a starting point for what he might find attractive in other men. If you're looking for something specific, then I don't think it matters. Just as a heterosexual man could be attracted to any particular characteristic of women's bodies, so could a gay man be attracted to any part of a man's body. It wouldn't seem particularly odd if a heterosexual character like particular neck shapes, feet, long fingernails, whatever. And your gay character could like any attribute of men you could think of. It doesn't really matter what it is. If he likes bears, then have him notice a guy with a beard, big biceps and a beer belly. If he likes twinky guys, have him notice a slim, hairless washboard stomach. Like I said it doesn't matter what it is, as there's as much variation in what gay men are attracted to as there is in what heterosexual men are attracted to. The stereotypes are just that. Personally I find shaved/waxed bodies, washboard abs, smooth faces and slim bodies repellant. I am attracted to literally every part of a man's body - but it has to be a man's body. I love big, hairy, smelly men. I love their beards, their ears, their muscles (not necessarily massive, but it helps if they're visible), their bellies, their legs, their feet, their butts, their hands, literally everything. But only if it's a really masculine man. But again, that's just my taste. For every gay man who shares my taste, there will be another one who likes fem twink guys.
Backs, specifically upper backs and shoulders. There are many, many things I love about my hubby, but when we met I was particularly mad about his swimmer's back (and broad shoulders). I guess that's also something that's distinctly masculine. Sure, there are women who have broad backs but usually it's a guy thing. I also have a strangely specific preference for body hair: hairy arms put me off, but I don't mind hairy legs, chest or even stomach (unless super hairy), in fact I prefer hairy over waxed. I suppose for your character what he's attracted to can basically be anything as it comes down to his personality, his personal preferences. My hubby's said he's not attracted to decidedly feminine, delicate, heel-wearing, dress-wearing women because they often remind him of his sister, so it can even be something like that that dictates a visual preference.
I like broad chest and straight noses a charming smile helps. But actually, the main thing is confidence. A man who is confident with good humour, but kind - that will attract me almost regardless of his looks. (I am a woman, just so you know)
I worked for a guy that would become speechles at the sight of a man that was taller than he was, had thick, rough hands, thick forearms, thick neck, and generally thick body, but not fat, covered in hair but not too much hair. The man also could not display anything he thought of as feminine. The biggest thing was the thick hands/forearms, and penis size did not matter. As far as sex went, he liked only two things- going down on a guy and being fisted.
I'm with @mashers. There's just a huge variety of taste. You can pick pretty much anything. I sat here and tried of think of things I find attractive, but the problem is, the list is just too long. Lots of hair, no hair, some hair... big arms, thin arms, muscly arms... shy guys, confident guys, mean guys, sweet guys... alphas, betas, omegas... It's up to you.
Thanks to everyone for the input, but especially thanks for the hand job, @izzybot Seriously though, that's the sort of thing I rarely if ever notice in women and am relatively indifferent to that would make a good quirk for my MC. As I said, the story isn't going to be at all sexual, but the public straight male gaze has been beaten by advertising and Hugh Hefner into a pretty narrow set of common "likes." Gay guys seem to have more variety in their public attractions, as has been noted above. Twinks, bears, muscles, effeminacy, if I put him squarely into the fandom of any one of these camps, I risk squicking the others, but appreciating gorgeous hands? Long, strong lovely fingers, perfectly manicured, just a dusting of hair? It doesn't (to me) come across as fetishistic, but it adds something to the character that would be absent if he were simply a fan of poster-boy hunks. Nothing wrong with it, but rather stereotypical Now I need to research men's hands. Mike would. You can leave it on, I won't tell your wife
One factor nobody has mentioned (I'm a heterosexual woman, so take this with a grain of salt) is personal cleanliness. I love a tousled, casual look (can't resist a sturdily-built long-haired guy in jeans and a flannel shirt—with or without a short beard ...the guy, not the shirt....) but I am totally put off by greasy, unwashed hair or a look that says 'I'm allergic to soap and water.' I can't stand hair gel either. Yuk. I like a clean look. If they're covered in soil from having worked someplace dirty, or some other temporary grime, that can actually add to the appeal. But it's got to look as if the soil gets washed off every day. I hate bad breath as well, and don't find B.O. much of a turn-on either. Ditto a guy who smells like he just pissed himself. However, I'm also not attracted to fussiness. I'm one of those people who is NOT attracted to a guy in a suit. In fact, I feel sorry for them. They look uncomfortable to me. Some more than others.
IDK what to tell you my friend. While some have questioned my sexuality, I don't really know what to say, seeing as I am hetero. So I wish you the best of luck, and somebody can help you with your MC and his taste in men.
Actually, since I'm personally a bit of a low-budget dandy in the making, this is another good place for me to look into. Woolgathering, not an actual quote for critique.
As a gay guy, I might as well weigh in on this. @jannert has covered things that are important to me. Especially the suit thing. My father was a businessman who wore a suit every day to work, and I remember feeling sorry for him. I used to watch him putting on his tie and I'd think, "What the heck is that for?" It was pointless, uncomfortable-looking, and it seemed to preteen me that it was dangerous - some enemy of Dad's could grab it and strangle him! (Why my ten-year-old self was concerned about this kind of thing, I don't know.) My dad also kept his hair short and was always clean-shaven. I got the impression from watching him, and his friends and colleagues, that that look was respectable, whereas wearing jeans and a flannel shirt (for example) and having long hair and a beard marked you as a semi-illiterate, poorly-paid bum. (To me, that look meant you were an artist, a writer, or a musician.) It was only when I moved to the west coast (the North American west coast, that is) that I met long-haired, bearded guys in jeans who were lawyers, doctors, business executives, etc. Anyway, I suppose the first thing that attracts me to a guy physically is a V-tapered torso. Broad shoulders, wide, strong upper back, tapering down to a narrow waist and hips. Michael B. Jordan in Black Panther is an excellent example (not referring to his race, or to the weird skin effect they did on him; I'm just referring to his torso shape.)
Actually bald can be quite sexy if the guy is frank about it and doesn't try to conceal it. In my opinion anyway.
@Iain Aschendale why must you do that?! My ex once asked me which male celebrity I found attractive. So I told him, and he dug out the worst picture he could find of that person and haunted me with it every time I commented on someone's good looks. He'd saved it to his phone specifically for that purpose.
I like a man coated in sweat, or piss. Coated in piss under the hot sun, standing there, jock-strap like Kyoto wrestling, and when he breathes I can taste his marlboro, his high-spiced Vindaloo probably shared with the boys, onions and maybe whisky? Then I reach for him, and quench my thirst long those dribbling highways, rivulets down the belly. That's me, y'know, same as @jannert I like dirty pigs, sometimes in a suit, of shit. Don't say 'handicapped' in your quest, @Iain Aschendale . That's like handicapping yourself before its even rained. Much love. Deleted that last section, hmm
Those aren't sexy hands, at least according to my standards. Ring aside, they're pasty and they've got no personality. For me, part of the appeal of men's hands is the connection to competence, which I find really sexy. I'm not sure if this would apply to gay men or not... but for what it's worth, I like hands that have clearly been doing things my hands don't know how to do! My mechanic has sexy hands when they're clean but still have a bit of grime ground into them, when they're strong from having done lots of work, etc. Any sort of physical labour, really - I'm a white collar worker and my hands can type and hold a pen, and that's all that it looks like the hands in your image can do. I want hands that suggest they can do something else! Someone who prefers a more artistic sort of man might prefer more artistic sorts of hands. The hands as the window to the soul! (And the hands in your image are a window to nothing)
I’m with @BayView about the hands... I had the same thought, but couldn’t quite the words to articulate it. The reason hands are interesting is because they can show personality. One time I saw a guy with scars on his knuckles. He said he used to get into a lot of fistfights when he was a teenager. It’s dumb, but it was a little hot.
Feet don’t matter so much, hmm? I think I pass on the hands, but my feet have lumps, and my chest is ‘long distance only.’ Beautiful thighs and English teeth. Probably better if I smashed them out. People get uneasy when I smile. One of my projects when I sell the collection.
