The Not Happy Thread

I don't expect to win, and waiting would be less of an issue if Daniel didn't keep alternating between broken promises and days-weeks of silence about what is going on.

 

I'm mad at one of my online friends on another site. At least try to respond to me once in a while, and when you do (like today) there's no need to be all PMS-y. You're not the one who waits for months on end to get responded to.

You're a grade A D-bag, Oliver.

I made my last response to him rather short and snippy. Maybe he'll apologize. #sorrynotsorry

 

(Oh and FYI: this isn't the same friend I have posted about before, the one I'm writing the book about. That is a different,better, friend.)

 

FYI for those that have the same thing happen to them, I got that hair out of the back of my throat by swallowing a whole spoon full of peanut butter at once without letting it melt in my mouth.

 

That awful, awful moment when you cut into a lemon and juice squirts into your eye...

 

Try handling naga jolokia peppers and then rubbing your eyes. It's especially pleasant if you don't realize the four times you washed your hands wasn't enough, take off your contacts, and put them back on the next morning: that way there's chili on both sides of the lenses. Oh well, at least my eyes didn't feel sandy after that...

 

I guess you could say I'm not happy....

I've practically wasted the last two months of my life by planning to go to the US - applying for a visa (190 dollars non-refundable), getting a certificate from the police, attending an interview with the US embassy in Belfast, getting all the documents in order, only to be denied entry...

I was denied on the basis that I had no job here in Ireland/UK. I tried to explain to my interviewer about my dad's cancer diagnosis and that it wasn't in my interest, career-wise or family-wise, to stay long-term in the US. She was having none of it.

Back down to reality now and I've started applying for jobs at home. I've applied for three jobs today at various places. How boring is that compared to the thought of spending St Patrick's day in New York partying...

 

@Mackers Sorry to hear that... I had similar problems myself, although in my case it had more to do with marital status. I appreciate how aggravating it is to go through all the planning and juggling, only to find that the powers that be won't give an inch, even when guarantees can be made to the effect that you will not cause a drain on their economy in the event of job loss or dismissal.

Having said that, by the time myself and my American husband had given up with American bureaucracy, we started getting it in the ear from the bloody British Home Office. I ended up having to launch an appeal by using my Irish passport and citizenship and citing the Treaty of Rome. (Just as well I'm not one of these hardcore Unionist types. )

Red tape sucks!

 

Yikes...Hopefully you got it all sorted out in the end I hope?

My problem is that I threw all the eggs in one basket. I really had my hopes up for this trip. A friend of mine is living in New York. I spoke to him, he said he'd a spare room in his apartment, had a job lined up for me n everything. It sounded too good to be true!

Oh well, have to take it on the chin. I'll get a job now here at home and park the idea of America for a while and maybe look at it again in 6 months or so

 

That's probably the best plan of action. When they check your history they will see that your are at least attempting to play ball and fulfill their criteria.

It's good that you haven't been put off, stamina is where it's at... these things take time, but as you know paper pushing can take an inordinate amount of time, not to mention superfluous cash. @erebh can testify to that.

 

This woman has you beat I'm afraid.

 

Today I reached an all time low in my procrastination. I was supposed to be writing, not really feeling it all day, so when the doorbell rang, I actually agreed to do a survey! For the first time in probably ever, I let the poor lady in and sat with her chatting for over half an hour, answering all kinds of stupid questions such as "Which of these railway discount cards have you heard of ?" and "Have you used the internet in the past month?" Yikes. Now I'm going through some scanned photos I haven't had a chance to sort out for the past six years of so, and I found one of me and my uncle. He was a regular Cat Stevens and I had a bowl cut...

 

wow @jazzabel ...bored much? lol

 

I effin can...

stamina, patience, lots of dosh and the self-constraint of not choking someone who looks for answers in a friggin manual... "Hmm let me see Sir, so you asked question 983471a, ok I found it... page 1173 of the stock, bullshit-answers manual... ok Sir I found the solution, please check our website for further details, can I be of any more help to you today Sir?"

AAAARRRRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!

Nice to see @obsidian_cicatrix with an Irish passport

 

@erebh. I usually hold both, but my British one has lapsed. Truthfully, I've always felt safer traveling on my Irish one, so I'm in no particular hurry to replace it.

 

Long story short, me and my ex split on good terms. She says she still wants to be friends, as do I, and that she'll be there for me. She ignores me for the next two weeks and I find out she's fallen into bed with someone who turned up towards the close of our relationship. So, I confront her. She insists she didn't cheat or leave me for him, and in all honesty I believe her: he asked her out and she said no, and when I asked her to stop sleeping with him, because it would keep old wounds open, she agreed. He blew off some steam at me - 'it's her choice' and all that - and I explained that she'd chosen to keep me as a friend, and should thus treat me with some respect. So that's all good.

The annoying part is that this person has, for all their many and varied good traits, the emotional awareness of a pond. Not pond life, an actual pond. She can't possibly comprehend what she's done wrong, or why I might be upset, and now I'm pretty sure she's convinced I'm the one in the wrong for asking her to please stop pooing in a recent injury. I trust her to stick to what she said, because she's made similar foul-ups before (before we were together - exceptionally long story) and stuck to them then, but, still...pride and not being self-aware are an irritating combination.

 

An interviewer? That's nuts right there.

I thought all you had to have was a round trip ticket and enough money for the trip. Guess you have to blame all the overstayers, and the political ineptness dealing with them. I would think there must be alternate ways to demonstrate your intention to return home.

 

I read your post too quickly and I thought you were talking about your martial arts status. I was going to ask if they thought you were some kind of terrorist because your hands and feet were licensed weapons.

 

I dunno dude, sounds like you should have ignored it. You do look like the one in the wrong. You've agreed to be friends, not overseer of her new life.

 

The truth is, I have a criminal record...I got in a fight outside a nightclub in late 2010 when I was a student (19 years old), and anyone with a criminal record it is recommended that they get a visa. I thought it would be good to be honest and upfront. The reality is it increases the scrutiny on youx100, and I was nervous which didn't help. Oh well, you live and you learn

 

Find an American and get married.

 

Believe me, I would love to find an American princess...she might fall for the Irish accent lol

 

Hang out at the airport bar and see what you can catch.

Well I kind of have some bad news. I have been complaining that I have a hair in the back of my throat, well that's not what it is. My papillae on the back of my tongue are swollen which more than likely means I have some kind of infection. My throat is swollen a bit too. Unfortunately I can't go to the doctor until Monday now.

 

I get where this logic's coming from, but it's inaccurate: I'm not trying to be 'overseer' of anything. I don't have that kind of energy. Even in the relationship I couldn't give a damn what she did, up to and including people (we both had a 'same gender's fine at all times, opposite gender only when the other's there too' rule). But I do get annoyed when people who claim to be my friend don't act like it.

If you're friends with someone - and we were close friends, who'd tackled some seriously major things together - you take their feelings into consideration because they're your friend, not when it's convenient. She knew I'd taken the break-up worse than she'd expected (it was a complete shock: the night before she was glad we were fine), and that I was in a pretty abysmal place generally, and she was the one who said she wanted the friendship to continue. It wouldn't have killed her to wait a few days. Since she didn't and put a lot of salt in an open wound, I don't want her reopening that particular wound. Everything else is a-OK.

 

I guess I am confused at what the situation is. If you're no longer together, you are not a factor in whether she has sex with anyone. I'm not sure how you even know the information.

I don't know -- I don't even really understand "rules" defined by the gender of a friend. My husband and I both have friends of both genders and have never had any "rules" about interactions and who else was present.

In any event, I'm sorry that you're feeling badly right now. Time will make it better.