The Not Happy Thread

Yeah. We've been living together about 3 and a half years now.
She annoys the hell out of me at times, as I am sure I do to her. Yet I could not imagine life without her.

Okay, can't make this isn't a happy post though. This is the Not Happy Thread. -Hmmm

I have no health-care for me or my family until February due to a mistake by the insurance company. (They admitted to it but said they could not fix it without me paying a new deposit of 2 months advance, unless I wait until February.)

So yup. Praying no health problems in the next month.

 

^ I hope so as well.

As for my Not Happy:

Just got back from the dentist. Apparently I have a cavity developing in my lower molars and they want me to come back Friday for minor filling. Yaaaaaay!!!

 

Won't go into too much detail, but I may - or may not - have acquired something incurable from sexual relations with my ex-girlfriend.

About to grab some popcorn; gonna' be one helluvah show this Friday!

 

Oh. Um...sorry about that. Good luck! D:

My not happy:

So after submitting the rough draft of Chapter One for my fantasy to three different people, and having one of them come back and say it's filled with plotholes and SPAG issues.

Now my griping is NOT the review. I'm more than pleased to hear of the issues I still have to work on. There's an excitable part of me that wants to take another crack at Chapter One, this time instilling the critiques the person gave me.

That said, it's accompanied by a voice that says:
-> Wow, you're a failure. Clearly you can't get past Chapter One. Face it buddy, just give up!!
-> No one would like your story. Why do you persist?!
-> You're a fucking moron for sending this pile of shit to three different people. You're a loser. No one thinks your stories are all that great.
-> You're like a kid who keeps a livejournal page that only his mommy reads and likes! You're a loser.

I know this sounds like it belongs in the Mental Health thread, but I felt this was better. It's just annoying to have this constant internal voice telling you how pathetic you are. >:[ I understand now why there's a stereotype of the alcoholic author.

 

I have written 4000 words fuelled on a weird mix of sugar.
Now, the following day, I have to edit this garbled mess.

 

It sucks she's taking it out on you, but at least you know she's not actually angry with you. Try to help her solve the issues she has that cause her to act it out this way. If left unattended and unresolved, all that shit will eventually poison everything.

At least you both have jobs. And I assume you're healthy too. You two are so, so lucky, you know.

Sorry to hear about this. I know the wait sucks. I still remember, after 10 friggin years, how that piece of paper with the word NEG looked like in the piece of paper I got from the doctor. It was capitalized and printed in Courier. A small font. Huge relief. I hope things turn out well for you!

 

my son fell asleep half-way early last night and I still managed to write fewer foods then I did right now.

 

I'm fucking angry at my country ('United'?! Pah!! Don't make me laugh.) and humanity as a whole following that viral video of the guy getting tortured for two days. Guess it's just easy to hurt others when they don't look exactly like you in some degree. That's humanity for you, I suppose.

What you all are witnessing right now is my 'cynical, misanthropic' side that believes all humans are mere apes laboring under the delusion of civilization, how we're just looking for one good excuse to torture and murder each other. It'll soon pass and I'll be the plucky lil' Link the Writer I always am...but right now that other side has taken over. I'll do what I can to keep it under control but this is just how I feel right now.

 

I missed that news. Not happy to see it, but I worry that this is only the beginning of a whole bunch of stupidity to take place on both sides of the issue(s).

 

I'm now composing a song in my head I title, Tell me I'm the Bad Guy. In it, the narrator sings about how he'll be willing to be the monster they want him to be because that's what they're looking for.

Point is, shit like this will only encourage more violence and disunity.

 

Tell me I’m the bad guy, bad guy, bad guy,

Tell me I’m the one that you hate

Tell me all the reasons that you despise me

Like you told me that you loved me on our first date


Tell me I’m a monster, only pretending

To be like a human only for fun

Tell me with the scream in your voice still ascending

Even when you know that it’s safer to run


Close?

 

WARNING: Long-winded stream-of-conscious thought to air it out post:

To be honest, perhaps maybe I'm being a bit too unfair to the entire human race? Judging an entire species/race because of the failures of a small percentage is mentally dangerous. By that logic, I myself must be a horrible monster just looking for an excuse to torture some poor sap in my basement even though that's, like, the exact opposite of what I'd do. Of what any sane human being would do. So why is my anxiety basically screaming for everyone to confirm to me that no, of course they wouldn't do anything like that. And, uh, is it quasi-racist of me to be thinking, "Why isn't the black community saying something about this?" I think so, because that's putting the blame and responsibility on an entire race. If some white fuck went on a shooting spree and someone said, "Why aren't white people saying anything about this?" I'd be rightfully offended. How dare they lump me with that white mass murderer? Therefore, I deduce that if I were black, I'd also be rightfully pissed if some white dumbass assumed that my not speaking out against whatever stupid shitty thing some black person did equaled that I'm totally onboard with it.

So I'mma do myself a favor and shoot that insensitive thought down. :3 -kaplowie-

And despite my anxiety telling me that those who get along with people different from them are merely faking it... I don't think that's true. At least I sincerely hope not. Otherwise teachers who help disabled children are one of the best mercenaries I've ever seen. xD "Yeah, I'll help your blind, crippled kid, but you owe me." Ha! Well, I'm gonna go on a limb here and say that 99.999999% of them actually, legit want to help out of the kindness of their heart. Just like I'm gonna go out on a limb and say that people are basically capable of seeing past physical appearances to see the human being within.

Well, just wanted to get that out of my chest. And I feel a bit better now. You all keep being awesome, you hear me? I don't care if you're space aliens from another planet, you just keep being your awesome selves.

 

It's a horrible thing. It does not happen very often, yet the amount of media attention that it got is what causes people to feel like you are feeling now. To think the whole country is going to hell.
If it wasn't 4 people of a single race, against someone with a mental condition, then it wouldn't have made the news.
Lets take a look at Chicago...
Shot & Killed: 713
Shot & Wounded: 3666
Total Shot: 4379
Total Homicides: 795

So... Over 2 homicides a day.
About 12 people are shot in Chicago on an average day.

Yet per 100,000 people, we are still ranked 99th in number of homicides.
United States - 3.82 Per 100,000 people


Honduras 84.29

Venezuela 53.62

Belize 45.09

Jamaica 42.88



So yeah. Things can kind-of suck. Honestly, we have it pretty good though. (Except Chicago)
The media just draws a lot of attention to get more viewers.

 

Thanks for the support! All is well it would seem. Have to go back in a month for the blood test and all that jazz, but I'm sure I'm good.

Haha, fortunately no. My parents are cured of grandson/granddaughter-itis. Birth control implants and condoms will do that for you.

 

Pretty sure this is influenza. No sleep last night, my nose was clogged waterboarding style, so every time I drifted off for a moment and closed my mouth I woke up in a panic. Lots of drugs today, I think I got some sleep in, but writing, grading, and using power tools are all off the menu.

Ugh.

 

On semester break or I would.

 

I've officially been sick for SEVEN fucking months and no one knows what's wrong with me yet, you guyyyyyyyyys!

 

Judging by how unhappy this scenario has made you, I think your love language might be words of affirmation (as is mine). And it sounds like your "love tank" might be on empty if she's always getting frustrated with you. Not that we don't all get frustrated from time to time, but the whole thing with Love Languages is that, if ours are being met adequately, we can handle the harder times much easier. Maybe you should encourage her to encourage YOU more. It's easy to get annoyed with stupid stuff, but when I'm actively focusing on how I can give words of affirmation to my partner, eventually I should be so busy trying to love him that I don't find it necessary to make flippant remarks about something that really doesn't matter. Also, hot pockets are meant to be devoured anyway. She's doing it wrong.

 

Went to the doc, he laughed when I said I thought it might be influenza. Apparently without a massive fever, it's just a common cold, and my temp was half a (celsius) degree low from the official 37 this morning.

Of course, my temperature always runs low. For thirty-odd years I've had doctors telling me "You're at 98.5, that's not a fever!" when I know that that's about a degree high for me. Anyway, lots of medicine, hoping it clears up soon because I have things to do other than staring dazedly into the upper corners of the room....

 

At least it hit when it did, hopefully you`ll be over the worst of it by the time you have you have to go back to your day job. I`m still jealous over that ridiculously long semester break though. I`m sure it`s stranded over there but from a American stand point that`s a bloody long break for (what I assume to be) a public secondary school.

 

It's actually the break between school years, so think American summer break. But yeah, good timing, and either the drugs are working or it's finally clearing up.

 

I can barely imagine how frustrating that is. I had a sever multiple sinus infection that took over three months to completely recover from, and even longer for my ears to return to normal. It was so upsetting. I was in a country that I didn't speak the language and the people I was with didn't seem to understand how sick I was. I'm a pretty high functioning sick person, and when I come to the point where I'm actually asking for help and am even scared, it's serious. The fact that I was so upset was dismissed as being homesick, even though I wasn't.

Hope you find a solution. Seven months sounds unbearable.

 

While my problems don't even compare to @No-Name Slob : Three days in and I still feel like crap. >:[ I swear, my body is declaring a war of independence on me right now.