The Not Happy Thread

Clove oil. A very very little goes a damn long way. Like the end of a toothpik little. Search for my post on this. I forget where...

 

Another hair stylest chopped off most my hair again

I don't know what to do anymore

I literally say "I'm growing out my hair; I want it as long as possible"

I show photos of the style. I show photos of me with my hair with the style

And with just that one first snip, there go inches I've worked so long to grow and I can't do anything about it at that point



What's worse?

He didn't even thin out my hair, so now it's short and thick as hell and it won't fall right naturally (it already is contorting just 5 minutes after leaving the salon).

I just want to look cute for even just for ten minutes. Why is that so hard to ask?

Now I'm just crying by myself in a subway waiting to head to my 2PM meeting.

 

So sorry, sweetheart. It's not fair to be ignored. Some stylists can be so selfish. They just have to 'express themselves', heedless of wishes, then you have to sit there, knowing they broke your trust, and hope it'll be okay. I say their 'expression' be damned.
It's you and your hair looking cute.

 

Roses are red, it's 115, what the hell was I thinking? No Vaseline.

 

Puppaayeee! WTH you are doowaang? Hawgoats it, Bruh?

try personal luuuuben schnitzengruuben!!

 

So..... hungy.... boneless.... fading..... *faints*
"please administer almond butter, honey, and chocolate chips. Immediately!" *alert*

 

Just musing over my brain looking like the fried eggs in the "This is your brain on drugs" commercial, and writing. The third book in the trilogy is coming along quite nicely.

 

The busy ant, while us grasshoppers play?

 

Can send a sample of said version of literary cocaine given an email address....if it be your poison.

 

I mean, at least it isn't as bad as the one time:



It took a year and a half to grow back to where it had been. . .

I know I have a rare face that short hair works on supposedly. I know. That's why my hair has been varying degrees and styles of short since I was a child up till senior year of high school. And back then, I let stylists go wild.

But I'm chubby right now and I want the change of feminine long hair. Once it's reached midback length or so, I'll probably do something crazy again like an undercut or half shaved or just hack it all back off (if I'm skinny).

But right now, just let me grow my freaking hair.

｡ﾟ(ﾟ´Д｀ﾟ)ﾟ｡


Edit: Also, if you have to hack it off, at least make it cute and well done. I'm dreading having to spend more money on going to someone else just to fix it.

I know I should wait till my normal stylists are available, but my hair was gross and something needed to be done—I thought. I should have just been long and gross another week and then been long and pretty ever after.

I really should blame myself, but I wanted the pick-me-up confidence booster that hairstyles usually do. I felt like crap so long, I just wanted to feel pretty.

That'll teach me

 

'Will it fit?' tryouts?

 

<Somehow, despite being a whale, I manage to do so.>

 

LMAO! I hahahaha hate your entire facial region right now ahahaha!!!

 

Love this! What is it?

Weakly, do I smile. Vast, is my grattude, vast as thy ocean. Grateful, am I, for the way in which your great tail packed it in my blowhole.
*abase, abase"

 

Why do I do this to myself?

I set the details within the curriculum, I could choose someone other than Malcolm X. I could just show them Indians being beaten at the saltworks to illustrate Gandhi's nonviolent protest.

Wait, I do show that to them, in conjunction with the Martin Luther King Jr. portion.

Why do I have to teach them about Malcolm X? Why not just keep it all sunshine and roses and We Shall Overcome? Because when I show them Malcolm and his anger, I have to show them why, why he was so fucking pissed off, why he didn't know his real name, and that means that clip.

You know the one.

The Middle Passage, from Amistad. The one that leaves me stepping out multiple times during the 8 minutes to dry my eyes.

They hide theirs. Sometimes they weep.

I wonder what kind of aftercare was provided for the players after that scene.

 

There’s always James Baldwin or, if you want someone on the more extreme side, Marcus Garvey.

 

There's a guy who I used to call my best friend during university. Ya know, doing stupid stuff together, hanging out all the time - the guy practically lived in my one-room apartment.
He had mental health problems though and they got so severe, he had to quit studying and move away. We tried to keep contact but over time, he only wrote me when he was about to commit another stupidity that would only make his situation worse. Not for any advice, mind you. Just to brag and moan. It wore on me and so I stopped replying to those messages.
Today, after almost a year of silence he writes me again. About what?
If I still have that picture of him on a drug trip gone bad.
Yeah.

 

Yeah. I set a standard for myself, then go to spectacular length to show how far off I get from it. Shitfuck!
I started out happy...

 

So you lost your shit for a few moments, so what. You are only human after all,
and you are allowed to get pissed off once in a while. It doesn't make you evil or
anything, just a person like the rest of us.
Please don't beat yourself over it, it happens to the best of us.

 

Goddammit. Insomnia is back. Its all cause of my birthday...birthdays. Old regrets always swing back around this time and plague me when I try to sleep.

 

Wouldn't help, it's the underlying cause of slavery that does me in. They only learn about it peripherally.

 

Hey, slingshot ammo! Ahem. JK I mean kitties!
It's okay, I went to the character bar and drooled in my beer for awhile. My MC is well on his way to getting shitfaced!

 

This isn't exactly a 'not happy' but I think it fits here best. I finally told someone something I'd been meaning to tell them for a while yesterday, which wasn't really pleasant for them to hear, though I did it as gently as I thought I could at that point. The message basically was "please grow up". I like being spoken straight to when I'm being a less than all right version of me for too long, but I don't know many people that do, and I can tell my friend's feelings were hurt. I'd do it again, but I feel bad still. I actually prefer being in the other seat.

 

I've been reminded of bad things from my past these past couple of days and it get's me emotional.

I'm really bad at just... moving past things. They stick in my brain forever and sometimes they just poke at me to make me sad.

Vacation in two weeks. I just have to survive two weeks.

ETA: And I'm pathetic enough to listen to poor recordings of myself singing depressing songs... like what the hell?

 

Good for you. That’s hard.

Honestly I’ve stopped doing that. The thing is, it only goes well if the person you’re talking to actually values your feelings. And if someone is being such a dick to you that you actually have to talk about it... generally they already know their behavior is upsetting you and they already don’t care.

Good luck. I hope it turns out well for you.