Things That Annoy Me, But Shouldn't

Same here, but when my friend meets Stephen King, he gets 27 pictures...

 

Sign in the toilet at work:

"In the interests of personal hygeine (hygiene), and the health of your colleagues. (Comma. Otherwise the first sentence is unfinished) Please wash your hands."

Never mind the plot, I couldn't get past the SPaG. And when you're stuck in there for several minutes with nothing better to do than read and re-read it...

 

We have a sign in our toilets at work - 'Please leave these toilets how you would like to find them'.

Does that mean I can stockpile some books and magazines in here?

 

I like the sign (in a unisex restroom) that said, "Our aim is to keep this restroom clean. Your aim will help. Gentlemen, please move closer; it's shorter than you think. Ladies, please remain seated for the entire performance."

 

Threads on WritingForums. >:c

 

We have inspirational quotes in our bathroom at work, one of which says "make shit happen". I can't remember the others, though.

Speaking of workplaces:

I'm so infuriated by all the people who feel the need to give me an essay about why they don't want to donate money to cancer research. If you want to give money, that's great! If you don't want to give money - fine - but there is a line behind you which won't go away quicker because your inability to say a simple "no". You monster.

 

People who make 'inviting statements', I'm sure that is not the correct term so let me give an example:

Person; Ah, fuck.... I really messed it up (inviting inquiry)
Me: Oh, what did you mess up?
Person then tells me his/her problem when he/she could have just said it from the beginning.

I can always tell when it is not sincere, and 95% of the time it isn't. This one guy I know does it all the damn time and I ignore him every single, time.

 

He's trying to build rapport before he unloads his issue. And most likely, he was raised to believe directness is rude. Unfortunately, his indirectness doesn't work with you. So the more he tries to connect, the more you pull away. It's called complementary schismogenesis. (See Deborah Tannen in That's Not What I Meant!)

But "insincere"? I'm not sure how that comes into it.

 

My sister-in-law does this and it's totally insincere. I don't know about anyone else, but when she does it, there's always an ulterior motive. She says things which invite inquiry and she does it so people ask and either giver her sympathy, or offer to do something for her.

 

A famous saying of mine is 'That sounds like a personal problem, and I don't care about other people's personal problems.'

Of course, some women in my past have not been keen on me saying this to them.

 

Trying to keep this on things that indeed I shouldn't be annoyed by, but am . . .

1) I'm at someone's house for the first time, and there I am, helping my hostess prepare the meal, maybe, or I'm babysitting and it's time for the children's lunch. Anyway, it's a situation where I have a legitimate reason to open their kitchen cupboards. And on the shelves I see stacks of bowls, plates, and mugs, all white, all brand-new, all exactly alike. And it turns me off royally. I know it's supposed to be clean and sleek and stylish, but to me perfectly-matched new white dishware screams sterility, shallowness, and a lack of imagination. It says, "This family has no heritage and no history." It shouldn't annoy me, but it does.

2) At the store where I work, one of the refrigerators on display features something called a "family hub." It's this touchscreen or monitor mounted on the refrigerator door were you can keep track not only of what's in the fridge and when it's time to throw it out, but also play media, keep the family's schedules organized, and so on. If you push a button on the demo model it plays a video on how wonderful this appliance is and what it can do. Well The music that goes with it is maddening enough. But there's one particular shot that drives me crazy. It's a closeup of a girl about 11 years old dancing to the music, insufferable smirk on her face, eyes closed in ecstasy at how wonderful this refrigerator is. I want to throw something at her head! Whenever they have me work in that department I always turn the bloody video off. And since I haven't seen or heard it going lately, I gather the department regulars don't care for it much, either.

 

I have often said, in fact a lot of the time, it is very common, "Hand me the scissors, I am trapped in my tie."

Of Course, some woman overhears it and think; what a tool.

 

But that isn't insincere. She wants sympathy, and that's her way of getting it and you know it. If you told her to ask for it straight out she'd probably tell you that would be rude.

"Insincere" would be if she said, "I don't want anything from you," and then hit you up for a thousand dollars.

 

I've been guilty of "baiting sympathy," and my friends have called me on it. I've learned to avoid doing it and simply say, "I've got something on my mind I'd like to talk about." I think insincerity plays into it because rather than communicating directly, the person in question is trying to pass off their cry for sympathy as casual conversation. It's kind of like when a child is nice to their parents right before the child asks for money. It makes a person feel "used."

It's better to just be direct. If I say, "I've got something on my mind" and someone says, "I don't care," that'll sting, but it's better than someone who pretends to care. I have friends who will listen and kindly help me to deal with my problems, but only if I'm direct. If I try baiting them, they'll ignore me until I just come out with it. They're teaching me to be less passive, which is a good thing.

I'm not annoyed by baiting because I've done my share, but I also don't respond to it like many expect. I might ignore it, or I might say, "If you want my help, tell me what the problem is." Usually they want me to comfort them, tell them it's not their fault, etc. Again, there's that play at sympathy or pity. Most just want comfort, not to be called on their guff.

 

It is insincere in that she's specifically being oblique to get what she wants. She's a manipulator and loves drama. That is insincere.

 

Oh, gosh, yes. I was in a therapy group where several members tried to do this. It just made things worse and I quit.

I think it comes down to the human need to feel accomplished and special. If you can't be the best at anything, there's some satisfaction in being the worst.

 

Me as well, I have learned that dressing yourself as a victim seems to work well in many aspects of life, so I have spent the last three years pretending to be trapped in my chair.

 

Read the Tannen book. One of her theses is that directness and indirectness are equally valid ways of communication, depending on the situation. The trouble comes when we put value judgments on either that apply all the time.

A lot of trouble between cultures comes about because of this. A culture that values indirectness is called dishonest and sneaky, and those that value being direct are termed aggressive and rude. Thence comes wars and conflicts and a whole lotta hurt.

 

People who celebrate snow as if it's the best thing on earth.

 

I hate to be serious for a moment, but if you were struggling for a frozen water source to place in your Scotch, you might feel differently.

 

I call it the Misery Olympics. Several members of my extended family are gold medal winners, and I limit contact with them as much as humanly possible.

 

I was talking about an isolated individual who uses this tactic to further her personal agenda. I'm perfectly aware of indirectness being a valid form of communication. It can also be insincere in certain situations. In the one I described, it is insincere and a manipulation tactic.

 

Standing ovations.

I think it's because of arse juice like Britain's Got Talent and The X Factor where a standing ovation is given for a contestant's hairstyle.