1. Published on Amazon? If you have a book, e-book, or audiobook available on Amazon.com, we'll promote it on WritingForums.org for free. Simply add your book to our Member Publications section. Add your book here or read the full announcement.
    Dismiss Notice
  2. Dismiss Notice
Tags:
?

Would you read this story?

Poll closed Aug 16, 2016.
  1. Yes

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  2. No

    50.0%
  3. Unsure

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  4. Need to read more

    50.0%
  1. laurasiren12

    laurasiren12 Member

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2016
    Messages:
    20
    Likes Received:
    3

    Unbreakable

    Discussion in 'Plot Development' started by laurasiren12, Jul 7, 2016.

    Hello,

    My name is Laura and this is the first time I've posted on here, so hi! I'm working on a story set around a Duke and Duchess of Australia. I wanted to do something set in Oz as I love the country.

    So here's my outline.

    Courtney' Coco', the Countess of Sydney. just two weeks after her eighteenth birthday her parents, the Duke and Duchess of Australia tell her she's to marry Emerson, a german earl. So she does a runner with her girlfriends to cruise the world giving them a summer of trying to find her.

    So what do you think?
     
  2. I.A. By the Barn

    I.A. By the Barn A very lost time traveller Contributor

    Joined:
    Oct 26, 2015
    Messages:
    1,131
    Likes Received:
    837
    Location:
    Last week
    Who's point of view is the story from?
    If its from her parents that'd be interesting!
     
  3. laurasiren12

    laurasiren12 Member

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2016
    Messages:
    20
    Likes Received:
    3
    No it's going to be from Courtney but it's an idea to put it from her parents. I'll think about it.
     
  4. Sifunkle

    Sifunkle Dis Member

    Joined:
    Aug 4, 2014
    Messages:
    479
    Likes Received:
    575
    I take it that this is an alternate universe of some sort? I don't believe Australia has dukes/duchesses/counts/countesses (other than vicariously, through the Commonwealth, in the British nobility).

    I'd need to find out more about the setting before I'd be sold on this idea. What sort of alternate universe are we talking? Has Australia left the Commonwealth and (somehow) become its own monarchy (who would the nobility be?)? Or has the British nobility extended a tentacle into Australia? Or perhaps the Australian nobility is in title only, and the characters still live in the UK (although your OP suggests not)?

    Does the story have an otherwise realistic feel, or are there other fantastical elements?
     
    Oscar Leigh likes this.
  5. laurasiren12

    laurasiren12 Member

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2016
    Messages:
    20
    Likes Received:
    3
    Wow you've given me a lot to think about but it's still within the commonwealth but the queen (think she be called annaliese) has decided to give her illegimate brother a duchy and that is over Australia. He doesn't rule as it's still governed by its own government.

    The story starts in Miami, Florida on Courtney's last day at high school when she's told she's to marry Emerson by her power hunger dad.
     
    Oscar Leigh likes this.
  6. SweetOrbMace

    SweetOrbMace Member

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2014
    Messages:
    43
    Likes Received:
    40
    Have you considered making it an alternate history? As other posters have indicated, Australia doesn't really have a nobility in the way the UK still does (even though it's still in the Commonwealth). Maybe make it where the British Empire never disintegrated the way it did, or if it did maybe Australia, New Zealand etc. never gained independence the way they did. Of course that raises historical questions as to why, but I don't think it need be something you dwell on (if you don't want to).

    Maybe you can just mention casual differences on the way of her cruise? For example, the various Caribbean states near to Florida are still fully ruled by the UK leading to both unrest among the populace (who want independence) and also that the authorities there are helping the dad catch the daughter.

    Either way, I think it sounds like a fun story. Kind of like Around the World in 80 Days with romance and alternate history, perhaps? Only with more focus on one country (Australia).
     
    Oscar Leigh and laurasiren12 like this.
  7. Shadowfax

    Shadowfax Contributing Member Contributor

    Joined:
    Aug 27, 2014
    Messages:
    2,982
    Likes Received:
    1,679
    Hi Laura,

    This all sounds fantastical, so I assume you're playing it for laughs, because...

    1/ The monarch creates her illegitimate half-brother (got to be a half-brother, unless you're saying the Queen's illegitimate too?) a duke? That's right back to Henry VIII's bastards! But by what right does she create a duchy in an independent republic? Usually a title comes with land holdings, from which the title derives its revenues. The Queen would have no land to give in Australia.

    2/ German nobility was abolished in 1919, although the titles are still borne in the surname by hereditary right (e.g. von Richtofen). And Emerson sounds a distinctly un-Teutojnic name. (Incidentally, Austrian nobility was abolished at the same time, but NO carrying on the aristocratic participle in the family name...my daughter recently worked with a descendant of the Hapsburgs, complete with the haemophilia!)

    3/ Why is the daughter of an Englishman with an Australian title going to school/college/university in America? I know Prince Charles went to school in Australia, but that was when the country was an independent nation formed of colonial dependencies of the British crown. And Courtney (and Anneliese) sounds very un-English.

    4/ Who created Courtney the Countess of Sydney? That would have to be the monarch; even if the Duke of Australia (that's a bloody big duchy to give away to anyone, let alone a bastard half-brother - Henry VIII only gave Richmond and Somerset to his bastard son, Henry Fitzroy) had title to Sydney, he wouldn't have been allowed to just sub-divide his holding in that way. The normal form of address for the daughter of this duke would be Lady Courtney Fitzmountbatten (I'm assuming the bastard half-brother was the get of Prince Philip) which would become Lady Courtney Smith if she married a Mr. Smith - she'd upgrade to Countess of Wittgenstein if she married the Earl thereof.

    (Researching this led me to an amusing website... http://www.thisismoney.co.uk/money/celebritymoney/article-2018111/Buying-title-Lord-Is-worth-it.html

    ETA: Several years ago I worked with Prince Albert...Prince Albert Smith!)
     
    Last edited: Jul 8, 2016
  8. laurasiren12

    laurasiren12 Member

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2016
    Messages:
    20
    Likes Received:
    3
    Shadowfax,

    For as long as I can remember I've followed royalty/nobility and I've done a lot of research, an awful lot. If you look carefully you will see that today there are still Dukes in Germany (Duke of Baden) and all of these titles are still carried down. The same goes for ex-royal countries like Brazil.

    As a previous poster suggested, it would mean history has been changed and that Australia (part of the Commonwealth and therefore still Queen of Australia - they still have pictures of the Queen in police stations etc.) While Australia is independant it still has the British flag in it's flag and therefore she could. (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monarchy_of_Australia)

    The reason she is sent to school in America is part of the story and is explained in chapter one. A lot of royal/nobility children are sent aboard to have better education.

    Also the is known nobility titles that are carried down the female line and therefore are countess' in their own right. Even though titles are usually carried down the male line I know that Jodie Kidd is, Marchioness of Douro as her husband, Arthur is the Marquess of Douro and heir to the Dukedom of Wellington. I've got likes on the site I'm posting on and people are already reading the outline.

    SweetOrbMace

    I love your suggestions and maybe I'll use it. The story is going on wattpad and if I do use it I'll dedicate a chapter to you, if that's okay?

    Thank you,

    Laura
     
  9. SweetOrbMace

    SweetOrbMace Member

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2014
    Messages:
    43
    Likes Received:
    40
    I had to google what wattpad is! But sure go ahead :) Good luck with the story.
     
  10. laurasiren12

    laurasiren12 Member

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2016
    Messages:
    20
    Likes Received:
    3
    Thanks and I hope you will check it out.
     
  11. NeeNee

    NeeNee Member

    Joined:
    Jul 4, 2016
    Messages:
    70
    Likes Received:
    33
    Is this a young adult book? The theme sounds like it would work for a young adult romance / adventure type story. I like the idea of playing with an alternate timeline or a parallel universe kind of thing. Or make up a country and base the country on Australia without actually calling it Australia.
     
  12. SweetOrbMace

    SweetOrbMace Member

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2014
    Messages:
    43
    Likes Received:
    40
    Yes, I will do.
     
  13. laurasiren12

    laurasiren12 Member

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2016
    Messages:
    20
    Likes Received:
    3
    No but maybe 13-25 age bracket, if I'm lucky 30. I've already started to post it so it's too late to chance it as I've got the introduction up. I didn't want to do royalty as it wouldn't give me ttihe realistic feel of her having freedom unless she was like Lady Amelia Windsor or Lord Frederick Windsor, who are still royals but lesser.
     
  14. SweetOrbMace

    SweetOrbMace Member

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2014
    Messages:
    43
    Likes Received:
    40
    Can you post a link? Or if that's not allowed pm me one?
     
  15. Oscar Leigh

    Oscar Leigh Contributing Member Contributor

    Joined:
    Jan 21, 2016
    Messages:
    5,532
    Likes Received:
    2,336
    Location:
    Inner West Sydney, Australia
    Are you actually Australian? If not, I can give a little advice on the portrayal of the country, though I'm not an expert since I haven't lived very long or experienced a broad range of areas.
     
  16. laurasiren12

    laurasiren12 Member

    Joined:
    Jul 7, 2016
    Messages:
    20
    Likes Received:
    3
    Sweetorcmac,

    Yes I'll send you the link. I've just uploaded the introduction but might take the duchy part out.

    Oscar Leigh,

    No but I'm English and understand how the commonwealth works. Like I've said before, and provided links, that Queen Elizabeth is the queen of the commonwealth and as Australia is part of said commonwealth they have a royal family!
     

Share This Page