Why Zombie Outbreak Will Fail

After finding this topic on crack.com, I realized how stupid zombie movies are. How in the hell would human civilization fall a part when weak walking corpses start to spread? Everything in this article makes sense, except animals. If an animal gets bitten, it might become a slowing walking corpse too. But over all, a zombie outbreak would never last enough to bring an end to all life.


http://www.cracked.com/article_18683_7-scientific-reasons-zombie-outbreak-would-fail-quickly_p5.html

 

Gotta love cracked... The way they educate me and make me laugh at the same time is spectacular. I love this line:

"Plus, if we look at zombies as a species, they are pretty much designed for failure. Their main form of reproduction is also their only source of food and their top predator. If they want to eat or reproduce, they have to go toe to toe with their number one predator every single time. That's like having to fight a lion every time you to want to have sex or make a sandwich."

 

This topic keeps coming back to life and shuffling about until it eventually falls apart. Let it rest in pieces already.

 

You could argue that in a movie where the dead reanimate and feast upon the flesh of the living, some suspension of disbelief about how the world works will be required.

 

That is why I prefer the ones that depict zombies as a result of some disease ("28 Days Later").

 

I know, that's much more plausible.

 

Zombies are now so over used they are really quite boring. I have a feeling, though, that some people will be disappointed if the world ends any other way.

 

I still like the idea of undertakers tying the shoelaces of corpses together ...just in case...

 

I, for one, have prepared for the Zombie Apocalypse.

 

Plausible takes a back seat to entertaining. Most fiction has a lot of holes in it if you want to look. How can it be that so-and-so just happens to be the protagonists father who happened to arrive at just the right moment and... Just enjoy it and stop dissecting the nuances of disease theory.

 

What a rotten outcome.

 

aaargh...

 

Zombie pirates now?

 

Just a wee bit of sarcasm. Does everyone have to be so serious all of the time on here. The topic's about zombies, man

 

I have (bad) tendency to come off serious and angry in most of my forum writings. I am trying to lighten up.

 

Speaking of less serious zombie films, I thought Warm Bodies was a clever little metaphorical film satirizing the current 'screen zombie' culture of people walking around paying waaaayyy more attention to their cellphone screens than to real life.

 

Shaun of the Dead for me.
Watch it if you haven't, much hilarity will ensue.

 

I've seen the whole trilogy of films. Just watched The World's End the other day, in fact.

 

Warm Bodies was amazing - total uniqueness. Honestly the first romance I didn't cringe at.

 

I'm not sure what's more unbelievable: a running zombie body without a beating heart, or a zombie heart that starts beating with the introduction of love. I was going to say a dead zombie, but realized that is a stage 2 zombie, i.e. a lifeless zombie.

 

If you watch it from the beginning, there's a quick little scene where R flashes back to how things where before the zombification began. The clue to the whole movie is in that scene. All the people in the airport are staring at their phones/tablets/computers. All of them. Taken from that point, the 'corpses' are actually stage 2 and the 'bonies' are stage 3.

 

OMG, that is too complicated for my poor brain to absorb. So zombification has evolved still further? Where is Darwin when you need him most. And I guess they need a beating heart if they want to get blood to the right places.